To: K-list
Recieved: 2000/03/26 00:19
Subject: [K-list] K-Awakening
From: Kari Tyler
On 2000/03/26 00:19, Kari Tyler posted thus to the K-list:
From: "Kari Tyler" <aumdevaATnospamhotmail.com>
Hi,
This is my second time to this list, although I guess I was just more of a
"lurker" before. I am back after a journey to India and Nepal that was such
an immense lesson and can't even begin to describe the lessons! The reason
I am posting is because my world has been rocked by K and I wanted to share
my experience. I had experienced K before I left as I had been intensely
practicing hatha for quite some time. At this time, I experienced ida and
pingala senations, the sound "aum" resonating at times, intense episodes of
esp, and feeling energy stuck at points in my back at times.
Part two, in India, I was riding a train. A holy man got on board, chanting
the names of God. I could not even look at him, as something about him was
so powerful. It probably was also due to the fact that his eyes were
completely white. I believe he had done his penance by looking at his third
eye, so that is why only the whites showed. Anyhow, as he passed by me, he
hit me on the top of my head. At that moment, it felt as if the whole world
passed through me, everything. I lifted my shawl to cover my head and face,
as I was crying.
After my India experience, my hair has begun to turn silver. I am 26. I
prayed before I left for India that my existing precepts about the world and
how it is formed be torn down. Kali heard me and slayed beliefs I held and
helped move beyond ego-body identification which I believe is a pitfall many
beginners fall into, and probably those who have practiced for a long time.
This process, to say the least, has been painful.
My psychic senses have become so developed. I was in Amsterdam, and my
lover was in Thailand. I awoke in Amsterdam, after having a dream, knowing
what my boyfriend was doing at that exact moment. And, I was right. I also
find that Kali finds her way to me. Or I find my way to her. For example,
walking at the Mall of America, we passed a magnet shop. A voice in my head
said to go inside and look for Hindu magnets. Really trivial, but listen...
And an image of Kali on top of Shiva popped in my head. So, I went in the
store and found a magnet with the exact picture on it that was in my mind's
eye. And it was the only Hindu magnet in the whole store. Many, Many more
incidents like this. My psychic capabilities have definitely grown. But it
is not always pleasant, as I am sure many of you know.
I guess before I had this experience in India, I felt really centered. I
realize now that a lot of that centered feeling was based on partly ego, as
I had fallen into the snare of spiritual egoism, being proud of my
discipline to the practice and of the K I began to experience. Now, I have
lost the ego problem, but I am so driven by emotions, that I feel as if I am
going crazy. Sometimes, when I meditate, I just begin to cry. And my
conscious mind realizes that this is not due to any thought in my mind,
because there is none. It just happens. I continue my asana practice, but
I do not find my center as much as I would like to.
Any comments would be greatly appreciated.
In light and love,
K.
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