To: K-list
Recieved: 2000/03/08 05:23
Subject: [K-list] experiencing change
From: centerseeker
On 2000/03/08 05:23, centerseeker posted thus to the K-list:
From: "centerseeker" <center.seekerATnospamvirgin.net>
Dear friends
I am a new subscriber to the list and would appreciate some feedback
regarding my experiences over the past few years.
Since starting meditation practice 7 years ago I have experienced the
movement of energy in my body with varying degrees of intensity. Emotionally
I have been on a roller coaster. The main area of movement has been in my
heart chakra, starting a few years ago as intense discomfort in the front
and intense pain and tenderness between my shoulder blades at the back. I
developed colitis 2 years ago. During this time of emotional upheaval I
experienced hot sweats while asleep at night-especially when dreaming.
Last year, over a period of a few months, I experienced what I can only
describe as a 'grieving' process with intense feelings in my heart
especially the sensation of energy pouring out of the back of my heart
chakra. It felt like an open wound. I was living in a community and was very
affected by the energy of the group and felt incredibly drained/tired most
of the time. I also felt like something was blocked and the energy wanted to
push through and burst out the top of my head. I experienced what I call a
'zzing' or 'buzzing' sensation like a trapped bee. I felt on edge most of
the time and started experiencing throbbing headaches for the first time.
Then during a meditation retreat, after an intensive yoga session, I
experienced heat in my pelvic region and energy rising up my spine and
reaching my crown. It felt blissful yet at the same time I became very
sensitive. Since then I have experienced heat and movement alternating
between left and right sides of the body,a cave like opening of my heart
chakra accompanied by deep feelings of compassion.
But now mostly I feel pretty uncomfortable with the buzzing in my spine and
recently the blocked feeling again, this time higher up 4 fingers below the
nape of my neck. I also feel generally low and depressed. From the little I
have read in books and the messages posted on this list I am assuming I have
had a K awakening. In some books it is described as being quite intense and
disruptive- frightening actually! On the other hand some people report
amazing experiences. The books suggest though that this is a serious
business and not to be fooled around without proper guidance- especially K
yoga and intensive breath work. I suppose I could describe some of my
experiences in fantastic terms but on the whole it seems to have been a
relatively gradual happening. Or maybe I'm having the preliminaries to a
full awakening?
On the whole I feel quite isolated and though I have sympathetic friends
none have experienced this. So I would appreciate (down to earth) feedback
and comments as well as recommendations of easy to understand books and
names of meditation/yoga teachers who are able to guide(especially in the
UK).
Reading some of the messages, I was particularly interested in the mention
of different channels and 'wrong' channels.
Thanks for taking the time to read this.
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