To: K-list
Recieved: 2000/01/16 21:16
Subject: [K-list] Crucifixion-Ressurection Initiation
From: Magne Aga
On 2000/01/16 21:16, Magne Aga posted thus to the K-list:
Dearl Jenell and Amanda...
You asked me several questions, and I decided to answer them in one single posting.
Jenell, <anglfthrATnospamiamerica.net>
January 15, 2000 5:42 PM
>Thank you, Magne, for also this latest posting. It too, and still what i
>work over on your first, is prooving of great benefit to me. It is
>helping my understadnigns, not only of my self, my life, but things I've
>encountered among others in this life, and even something of my 'life
>mission', I suppose one would call it.
>
>Considering upon the dream I related, about going down into that pit, I
>note several interesting things, and these things coincide with many
>other dreams I have had.
>
>While there are two possible directions presented in the material you
>give for what happens when we encounter the abyss, either crossing it
>safely, or falling into it to our destruction, in my dream, a third
>direction occurred.
Yes there are a third direction. After all, the Pearl falling downwards after the *waterline* is established, is - ipso facto -a DIVING into the Abyss. However, the fall of the Pearl, smashing our lower ego into ten thousand pieces when hitting the pineal gland, must be combined with the New-born UNITY of the waterline established in store. Otherwise, we would not be reborned on the other side. It is the PEARL that shall dive into the Abyss, not our Ego.
In the mystery schools in Ancient Egypt, the *death*, the temporarily removal of the prana-body - that part of our auric envelope which keeps us alive - was symbolized by Osiris beeing cut into pieces by a sword, while the Goddess Isis was putting him together again. These *reconstruction* of the empty shells of our previously, social made ego, would not possible without the previously established UNITY between the pineal and pituitary glands.
>In the dream of the pit I related here, I did go down into the pit, but
>i did not fall into it, I went down willing, and curious. In the
>community at the bottom of it, I was as an abserver, no one paid much
>notice to me, I just wandered about, observing. As the pit began to
>cllapse, I was not destroyed there, but immediately lifted up and out of
>the pit, to observe from that vantage point, the continuing collapse,
>and to feel great concern, compassion, for those trapped down there at
>the bottom of the pit.
>
>now, I have had all my life, and most powerfully in the past few years,
>many very vivd, strongly emotional dreams in which the 'theme' was in
>some way my 'rescuing'or 'setting free' something that was being
>oppressed, held under burden, bondage, for someone else's gain. Once a
>horse, being beaten as it staggered beneath a huge, too heavy burden on
>it's back, in another, a small bird that was struggling to fly with a
>big gaudy costume strapped to it, people following behind it, cheering
>at it's efforts, who got very angry at me for releasing th creature from
>it's burden, and letting it rest a bit before letting it fly away free,
>etc. They were insisting the bird was better for the costume it had been
>carryng, without it, it was just a plain brown bird.
>
>In what you write, you speak of seeking a pearl of compassion. In the
>dream about that pit, the abyss, it seems to me that I descended into
>the pit to observe those down there, to 'know' them as being people
>there, ordinary people, and then, as the destruction came, I was lifted
>up, to feel compassion for them, which I would not have, had i not
>journeyed down there and seen them there, known there were people down
>there?
Excactly. When the Pearl dives downwards, it isn't a personal matter only. It affects thousands of people with the same background, problems, situation etc. as yourself. It is a diving into the astral planes in order to rescue those beeing entrapped there. We are all ONE / WON in the Spiritual Realm.
>This relates also so very well with some patterns in my life experience.
>i have watched, been personally connected to, loved, so very many that
>HAVE destroyed themselves, with selfishness and anger and self pride,
>etc, all the negative things, watched them become bitter, mean spirited
>people that drove others away, often wondering mself why i continued to
>take the abuse from them i did to be able to stay by them. And yet, i
>still loved them, cared about them, sorrowed, even grieved, for what i
>watched them do to themselves, and being unable to help them see what
>they were doing to themselves.
Yes, but You are not the conscience of others free will.
>I think that dream of the pit was the symbol of where and how i have
>found my pearl of compassion. Was it not also written that Jesus, in the
>hours of his 'death', in which He lay in the grave, the tomb, following
>His crucifixion, visited those in the abode of the dead, before being
>ressurected? And does that not carry to the tomb is the womb, as by his
>descent into those depths perhaps for Him, as myself in my life, make
>those depths as the womb in which the seed was placed, to develope,
>until the birth of compassion for those one has seen there, is born into
>life?
The Pearl is the Pearl of Creation, a way to manifest ideas. In the esoteric doctrine, a certain image is used about these process of Creation.
Before the Creation, the *Sun Angel* KEEPS IT'S BREATH - a hint of the magic practice therein. Everything *keeps is breath*, as we say in the everyday language, when waiting on the outcome of a coming incident of importance.
Everything is Silence. Silence and darkness.... In these utter darkness and Silence, the Pearl suddendly falls. It falls, and falls.....
And when it hits the bottom, in an explosion - voila ! - Creation takes place ! The horisontal bar of light in the head vibrates as a Bow, as seen in the sancrit-sign for "OM".
This is creation, manifestation - the realization of your *birth-vision*.
The diving of the Pearl into the *underground*, into the dark caves of the tomb / womb, is a grounding process where Spiritual ideas manifests - instead of beeing just dreams. Jesus spent 3 days in the tomb, symbolizing the 3 states of consciousness (Delta,Theta,Alpha) *beneath* our conscious state. And *the three faces of Eve* became Unified by his ressurection.
As a benefice to these number, it should be noted that people with classical slit personality disorders, developes MORE than the three personalities emerging from the original split. This is due to what I wrote:
>The third eye Chakra is a center of a cosmic mirror game. Our Holy Guardian Angel is a phase-shifting reflection, a mirror of ourselves as we comes from the physical world. We think about ourselves in terms of Past and Future, instead of the Eternal NOW, and these fragments, these reflections, congregates into a sort of meta-reality.
In fact, as the disease evolves, the third eye Chakra MIRRORS the three personalities into six, etc.
+++++++++++++++++++++++
Jenell, <anglfthrATnospamiamerica.net>
January 15, 2000 9:15 PM
>>Dear Jenell. In your posting on Jan 14th, you mentioned *polarity shifts*.
>>It was entitled *Reflections about
>> the Holy Grail* - and became reading stuff within several secret societies.
> Sounds interesting. if you can locate a copy, could you send it to me or
> tell me where I could obtain one? Do you know which such societies used
> it? I am in membership within a group involved in esoteric, mystic
> matters, the White Eagle Brotherhood, would perhaps you know of them,
> and would perhaps it be known to those of the inner Brotherhood among
> them?
Yes, I know several persons within those circles using it. But I do not feel any needs revealing their existence. Some of their means of Initiation is very dangerous, and I do not trust the garanty of *religious freedom* expressed by our Constitution. They are groups without outer organization, without known names. They prefer to work in silence, as a silent undercurrent in our present culture. One of the *founders* - now departed - made long-enduring jorneys across Europe, gaining mystic knowledge from teachers departed before his return. Among his written remains - and tape recorded speeches - are something he called the *Book of Wisdom* - which later appeared to be fragments of the Books of *Lam-Rim* and *Dzyan*, which Blavatsky was blamed to refering to as a *fiction*, a *forgery* by orientalists not able to identify it. My own paper, however, was an attempt to put words on my own, personal experiences during my Initiation of death and rebirth. It was a way of *putting the fragments together again* after the Journey into an altered - and very dangerous - state of consciousness.
>> Today, only remniscents, fragments remains - some in Norwegian, some in
>> english - and I've actually spend some time with reconstruction attempts.
>> *Reconstruting fragments* ! A nice analogy to the work done in the time
>> period succeeding an Initiation !
>
>I understand what you say here quite well. i have for some years now
>been led to reconstruct the events of my life, write them and as I have
>and do, much is revealed to me of the significants of each of them, the
>effects on me, the lessons, the stages of growth, I've passed through.
>It is something as the reading of a really deep meaningful book the
>second and thrid time. The first only carried you across the surface,
>the later readings take you layer by layer deeper within.
Precisely!
>
> Anyway, two poles: Yin and Yang, masculine and feminine....
> >> two chakras in the heads establishes a new Ying-Yang polarity, the
> >> masculine and feminine aspects of the primordial force, *Father and
> >> Mother*.
>
>I'm seeing, it seems, something of a very broad concept of this concept
>of polarity shift, or reversal, as in the opposite images of the mirror,
>from a center point, or pivotal point, at what we would call the
>mirror's surface. Equating the mirror's surface, that pivotal point
>between,to the balance point at which all opposites meet and interact.
>I'm seeingit something as the number '0', from which in one direction
>one counts in 'positive numbers', in the other, 'negative numbers', but
>as one moves from the '0', we still count those going in the negative
>direction in a postive term. This concept is hard to put into words. I
>am seeng it as that of the yin/yang, masculine/feminine, adding and
>taking away, coming and going, the balance point, the pivotal point,
>being that at which each oposite 'begins'. I am seeing, it seems, in
>this pivotal shifting of polarities, something of as if as we proceed as
>one 'seeking' something, the shift to the opposite to be as then to
>become the one that is 'giving', or has available to give the seeker,
>that which is sought, and in the third point, what you are calling the
>'son', the becoming the thing sought itself. Examples, to seek love, as
>a negative state to love, a despostory for love, then as to give love,
>as a postive state to love, a source of love, then to become love
>itself. I don't know that I am able to convey clearly what I try to say
>here.
It's almost impossible to put words on the *Changeless continuity*. I've used the phrase *the still-point* to express these undefinable Tao or Zero: A point of rest which - however, never becomes fully developed. In meditation we can rest in our own awareness, our own pure consciousness, as observers of the Ever-evolving IS. And in this point of rest, it is not emptiness, but something ever evolving. When we have received clarity about something, then - *still* - there are more! A never ending process, the *still point*......... It's difficult to put names on in, since .... every time we give it a name, a definition - it has changed ! And doesn't fit into our conceptual world of relative measures (maya) !
>In much in dreams, and writings, i have
>been perciving my present state of being as something as that of the
>catapillar transforming into the butterfly. Of there being a point at
>which the catapillar no longer exists, has 'died', but yet, the process
>is not yet advanced enough for it to be a recognizable butterfly. that
>point in between, I have been expereincing as something of an 'ego-less'
>state, very disorienting. And expereincing a deep grieving I did not at
>first understand, but realized it is the new being I am emergin as, the
>primitive, forming butterfly, that is grieving the death of the
>catapillar, the one I WAS, that has died, is being disintegrated to be
>reintegrated into the body of the butterfly to be. Yes, I can see how
>that is actually the point of my being confronted with crossing the
>abyss. And of having to make the choice, to go back and attempt to
>re-animate the catapillar, or proceed in becoming the butterfly. I think
>I have already passed that point, though I'm still dealing with a lot of
>the painful aspects of letting my identity of the catapillar go, mainly
>in it's 'place' it had in this world, the people the catapillar related
>to, and that related to the catapillar, that the butterfly cannot.
>Becoming the vbutterfly meaans of neccessity breaking ties with much in
>the world that was that of the catapillar.
The caterpillar flying out of its cocoon, is a widely used image of the whole process. The caterpillar is FREE. The Violet Flame has burned all connections to that which prevented our further evolution, and we are free from the wheel of repetition (called samsara by Gautama Buddha).
As someone once wrote:
Been doing the same things life after life;
I've done it before, but it wasn't so right.
The same kind of people still knock on my door,
but soon they won't find me here anymore.
Packing my bags, gonna let go,
Leaving the things I don't need anymore.
It's the final step on a long, long road.
Finishing up, it's time to go.
Saying good-bye to nasty habits,
Bidding adieu to all that's untruth,
Adios to my old amigos,
Arrivederci, I'm starting anew.
I'll be flying high and moving free.
With nothing to bind me and nothing to lose,
Ain't singing the transmutation blues.
I've canceled my ticked for the wrong destination.
I'm burning the bridges to the land of temptation.
I've found the path that's narrow and straight.
I'm changing my ways before it's to late.
I've seen the way I want to be.
I've seen the light inside of me.
I'm ready to surrender, ready to release,
Eliminate the thoughts that rob me of my peace.
With nothing to bind me, and nothing to lose,
I'm singing the freedom song today.
>Yes, I think I comprehend this. I have come to call it such as 'just
>sitting', or 'just seeing', to observe without judgment of or
>interaction with what I'm observing, and waiting for what is revealed.
>Removing limitations imposed by judgements, expectations, movtitations,
>desire for outcome, etc. To realize that to think to 'know' closes to
>possiblities.
Yes, you describe Jnana Yoga.
Do You want a mirror ?
Just look at these very moment - with respect.
> I think this is where I now strive. i have, however, through my life expereinces, something of an advantage in understadning this, becasue my own mother disintegrated mentally in mid life, into classic Multiple Personality disorder, and i can see exactly how what happened to her realted to this, and of her state as it began to happen to her, she, too, had reached this point. I also have come to much understand of how, why, where, she was unable to negotiate this passage safely. It is one of the things in my life i see as related to what I speak of about that dream i had, of going into the pit to find my pearl of compassion. What happened to her was a terrible grief for me, and somewhere, I did not then know where, I still found compassion for her, even though she became quite abusive. I look back and it seemed she worked very hard to make others draw away and hate her, some thought she was kinder to me,since i stayed with her to the end, but no, just the oppostie, she was !
probably worse toward me, because now I've come to see how hard some part of her was tryng to turn me away, make me, too abandone her, hate her, yet she could not. I did not. For even then, without knowing why or how i knew, it was something in her that hated herself, that was trying to hurt HER, that tried to drive every one away.
I admire your attitude!
> > Should he fail, through cowardice, in making these self-anihilation
> complete, he is nevertheless pushed into the ABYSS. But instead of beeing
> reborn from the tomb on the other side, in order to be one Self as one never
> have been before, he DIVES into the ABYSS, hiding the elements around the
> Ego as if isolated from the Universe, and becomes a *dark brother*, a *black
> magician*.
> >
>And yet is that dark brother not the opposite polarity to the light
>brother? Did not such as my mther's falling into that abyss and becoming
>a 'dark brother', she contribute to the opposite polarity within me, to
>become a white brother? Was not the degree of her darkness instrumental
>in developing the degree of the light within me, as her efforts to
>alienate me grew greater, so did my strngth in overcome them grow
>stronger in response? Was not by her suffering in the darkness, my
>growth into the light put to test, in the sense of as the steel is
>tested in the fire to make it stronger?
I use the word *dark brothers*, because their mechanisms of self-defense prevents them for both giving and receiving light. It's just like Pink Floyd's movie *The Wall*, where the person therein builded large protection mechanisms around himself in order to not get hurt. A wall, due to traumatic experiences. But instead of protecting him - it destroyed him.
>> Our conscious mind is like a torch. It enlightens a very small area, and the
>> surrounding environment is darkness. In order to understand esoteric stuff,
>> we must move the torch, move the assemblage point of consciousness.
>
>Yes, as one must move with the small lamp through the dark cavern to see
>all that is there to be seen. I've come to some level of grasp of the
>concept of assemblage point, through study of shaminic principles. It
>related to the point within the cosmic consciousness from which we
>percieve. I still struggle with quite a bit of a sense of
>'displacement', feel 'out of sync' often, as if I'm walking halfway
>between two realms, two awarenesses, I have learned much in how to
>overcome that, but am still much working at integrating into myself what
>i have learned. Make what I 'know', to be as i 'am'. A part of my state
>of being.
Correct.
>i seem to have developed some level of being able to move between these
>states within my brain, and yet retain conscious wareness, that
>'observer' state. It is something of a dissassociative ability, it
>seems. But i seem to have pretty good conscious control over it, am able
>to shift rather easily and quickly at will. this seems from what I read,
>not common, this ability to move so easily and quickly between these
>states. But I seem to have developed it early in life, so it is
>diffiuctl for me to comprehend how difficult it may be for others.
Yes, detachment, can sometime cause *foggy* states of mind. This is one of the two potensial pitfalls in meditation. If Kundalini reach the head and stay there for a long time, *all energy up there*, it can result in considering the physical world as something alien, uninteresting - in short what have been termed psychosises. On the other hand, if ALL the energy goes downwards, without anything going upwards, we detach so much from our physical body as to develope severe diseases.
Therefore, I use Kriya Yoga as a balancing factor in order to let the energy ROTATE. The Chinese Yin/Yang symbol actually describes Kriya Yoga in a single symbol! The water flows upwards the beach, giving strength and masculine qualities..... Then it returns slowly, with rest and feminine, womanlike qualities.... Upwards, and downwards... The Ying/Yang symbol shows two drops of water, and the inner circles within each of them is the Pearl of Compassion which circulates.
>> While Kundalini moves towards UNITY, the Pearl of Compassion moves towards
>> DIVERSITY when it - and our ego - becomes splintered into Ten thousand
>> Pieces during crucifixion, but it's only Ajna and Sahashrara in cooperation
>> which can ressurect the new-born child of the High Self.
>
>I'm not clear here on what is meant by this 'diversity'.
>
>Also, i am uneducated in the terms 'Ajna' and 'sahashrara'. Could you
>explain?
Diversity is Creation, the Big Bang, our ego beeing splintered... The cross of energies causes *Unity in Diversity*, one of the slogans of the United States. Ajna and sahashrara are the pineal and the pituitary glands.
>Could you define 'Jivatman'?
It's the Spiritual essence of *hridaya chakra*, the 8-bladed SECONDARY hearth chakra (not the 12-bladed Anahata chakra). Hrdaya means *beauty* and was symbolized by the Queens Chamber in Great Pyramide. When the fourth and last *blade* of the root chakra *matures* - so to say - these Chakra becomes the center from which we can control the freewill rotations and movement of the pranic body, that part of the aura which keeps us alive.
> >The third eye Chakra is a center of a cosmic mirror game. Our Holy Guardian
>> Angel is a phase-shifting reflection, a mirror of ourselves as we comes from
>> the physical world. We think about ourselves in terms of Past and Future,
>> instead of the Eternal NOW,
>
>the NOW being the point of consciousness, the surface of the mirror, the
>neutral pivot point between the polarities?
Yes.
>> In the black magic, “left-hand” rituals of Tantra, on the other hand,
>> they renounce every tabus, breaks every laws of compulsion. They DRINK from
>> the Grail. They are no more total givers of themselves, but mean hucksters.
>> They exchange gold for dross. They sell their higher powers for gross and
>> temporary benefit. Through the conscious practice of breaking every tabu,
>> through BLASPHEMY, they seek Gnosis or Liberation.
>
>I understand that concept. those that think to seek 'freedom' by
>demanding, taking, to themselves 'right' to be 'above' the unity, others
>within the all. they in truth give honor and power to the laws of the
>darkness, by their giving it respect and recognition in their taking to
>themselves right to break it. analogy: the person bound under laws does
>not break a law because he fears consequences and accepts power over him
>by source of the law, the person enlightened does not offend in that law
>becasue it is not in his being to work that offense, even if there were
>no power of law over him, the one that has taken the dark path
>discovered there is no power over him, that can srtop him from doing as
>he chooses, and seeks his own power by deliberately offending in that
>law.
Correct.
>> Instead of becoming a neophyte, and gradually obtaining
>> esoteric knowledge through a regular initiation, an ADAM, or man, using his
>> intuitional faculties, and, prompted by the Serpent - Woman and matter -
>> tastes of the Three of Knowledge -the esoteric or secret doctrine -
>> UNLAWFULLY"
>
>By doing so without humility? To become not in unity and harmony with
>the powers, but to use them, have power over them, at his selfish
>command? To move from being under the powers, commanded by the powers,
>instead of to unite in harmony with the powers, to become over, above,
>to have commnad over, the powers?
Sorry, I was unprecise here. I actually refered to the secret doctrine called "Yar-gi-sang-thal-chen-po", The *Direct Way Upwards*, which is kept as *top secret* due to the extreme dangers these Initiation process implies. It was *unlawfully* because it was dangerous, not because it's the black way.
>While we seem to use for those such as I the term 'spontaneous
>awakening' the more i learn and look back upon me mife, it has been
>anything BUT 'effortless'. It was happening, i was traveling the path
>toward enlightenment, even if I did not know it as a deliberate,
>methocical course I had under taken. I was 'led' through it by a
>guidance from the spirit. While I only recntly learend of these terms
>and teachings, and became aware of what 'awakening' is about, I had been
>traveling the path all my life. I just didn't know the name of it! Ot
>the various initiations I passed throgh, just thought of them as the
>trials of life, and my life learning process.
There exist a secret tradition in China and Tibet, emphasizing these sudden Liberation, as mentioned above. It's almost unknown; only a few written remains mentions it.
+++++++++++++++
Amanda, mumblecatATnospamangelfire.com
January 15, 2000 10:10 PM
>>What a coincidence it is, that I at the present
>> time translates the *Saddharmapundarika Sutra*, the *White Lotus >Sutra*
>> into Norwegian!
>
>May I ask where you're going to publish these translations ?
>Or are they for personal use only ?
It's for personal use.
> > But in order to succeed in these UNITY, our old fragmented ego must die,
> > beeing absorbed by a higher unity. The Choice is given, whether to
> > destroy
> > the Ego, and give up ones Life, extending it to Universal Life, or
> >whether
> >he making protection mechanisms around the Ego and abide therein.
>
>Is it as they say the entire ocean trying to fill up in the single
>drop of water ?
It means that the lower ego no longer is the *center*, but reborn as a satelite around the High Self. We no longer act out of the *ego-perspective* but from the highest perspective possible.
But in a sense, it's only a movement of the assemblage point of consciousness, since - actually, the ego ALLWAYS is a sattelite around the I AM, while believing it is the center. It's a shift of the awareness.
> > In order to achieve UNITY, in order to CROSS THE ABYSS, one must
> > emancipate from thought by putting each idea against its opposite, and
> >refuse to prefer either.
>
>I think one may dive into the single concepts and tear the
>single concepts apart, thus avoiding the divisory aspects of
>these concepts.
>
>I must say I'm afraid of this abyss, or the vortex as it appears to me.
>
> > Should he fail, through cowardice, in making these self-anihilation
> > complete, he is nevertheless pushed into the ABYSS.
>
>Yes, that's what it feels like.
>The process us unstoppable and it feels like there is a death
>to die, a leap to be leapt.
>I thought self annihilation was no problem, but it turn out it
>may be. At any rate there is fear.
>I have heard of others talking about this fear.
>Maybe I only have a small fear, maybe this is not the final leap ?
>
>Or maybe the vortex is not really a vortex but a little step ?
>
>Even though I deeply feel that the Self is always present,
>giving up the little self is difficult.
>
>In sleep, the little self encounters the big Self and even though
>they are the same, big Self is so big and sees and is
>everything,
>little self tries to hide from this infinite presence,
>squirms under the light of the
>knowledge of the big Self like a fish on land
>
>It is worse knowing that self may be pushed across the abyss
>even when not wanting to. I feel camped up by the abyss and
>trying to stall, but unable to go back where I came from.
>
>Maybe this is all ritualistic resistance ?
Everything wants to live, whatsoever. Good things wants to live. Bad things wants to live. Everything that exist wants to be exactly as it is, it seems. Even physical diseases can return, because the rest of the body have *get used of the disease*. Resistance is another name for blockages in the chakra system.
Contemplating on these, we understand how we really are dependent of things, situations, people - which in reality stagnate our own evolution. A good way to *burn the ties* is the violet flame.
>>But instead of beeing
>> reborn from the tomb on the other side, in order to be one Self as one
>> never
>> have been before, he DIVES into the ABYSS, hiding the elements around
>> the
>> Ego as if isolated from the Universe, and becomes a *dark brother*, a
>> *black magician*.
>
>A fate worse than anything else ?
YES!
>> ordinary dreaming and the awake state. Therefore, the Maharishi movement
>> talks about *resting clarity* during TM as *the fourth state of
>> consciousness* (actually the FIFTH), *turiya*, mentioned in the vedic
>> books.
>
>Is this the state of absolute consciosness ?
Yes.
>So the small self /must/ merge with the big Self ?
Yes.
>I think I'm afraid of the I AM which stands alone.
>For the small self, standing alone equals loneliness.
>Of course, it cannot be like this as I AM is pure consciousness,
>but again, small self makes ritual resistance.
>
>OK, I'll sign off here.
>
>Hope you will get back to me on this, Magne.
>
>Best regards,
>
>Amanda.
Yes, I came back with a HUGE posting (Sorry about the bandwith), but it was so many questions to answer.
BLESSINGS FROM NORWAY
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