To: K-list
Recieved: 2000/01/12 22:54
Subject: Re: [K-list] Really wondering
From: Jenell
On 2000/01/12 22:54, Jenell posted thus to the K-list:
Mystress Angelique Serpent wrote:
>
>went
> into Victim for a bit, got over it again.
Yes, into and out of that, lots.
> It's flu, but in Kundalites it seems to be an evolutionary sickness..
>
Aahhh! 'Normal people get the Asian flu, hong Kong flu. We get 'K' flu!
Well, i'm sure ready for it to flew right onto where ever flu flies to!
>
>
> Yes, there is huge cleansing going on...
Had kinda figured that. Stinky sweat is often one of the after affects
of energy healing work, whether when on myself, or when I work on
others. It's the relase of toxins. but I'm not sure what brought this
on, what is being 'healed'.
I am wanting a hot bath but
> concerned that I'll pass out in the tub..
I took one, used strong smelly bubble bath andshower gel, but the smeel
is back on me within an hour, and my dirty clothes I finally threw out
onto the back porch, they were so stinky with it.
>
> Someone suggested I'm spontaneously becoming breatharian... wot?
>
Careful, might become lightheaded there, now! Her? Oh, don't mind her,
she's just some air head, you know! :)
> > my desire to smoke has flown out the window...
really ugly emotions toward me, have really been heavy on me
> >lately.
> Sigh, ditto.. this was sparked last Friday by a flame from an
> ex-friend I edited from my life more than 4 years ago.. and yesterday
> another friend raised her voice to me and I rolled up in a ball and started
> crying... I am feeling very fragile. Not my usual "bulletproof" self, at
> all..
that has been a part of thisvery difficult for me. i had really gotten
really good at keeping things like that in persepcitve, letting things
just rol ff, was really a 'cool and calm and collected' kind of person,
until the past several years. I still know in my conscious mind these
things are their 'problem', notmine, and that they are acting out of
ignroance and fear and their own hanng-ups and stuff, yet it hits me so
HARD, I've become that way, so very vulnerable to negative emotions,
hurtfulness directed toward/at me, I feel so vulnerable now. Sometimes I
feel like such a wounded little child inside, as if I'm back again to
being a little child, that couldn't stand up to the adults, powerless to
just tell them 'up yours' and walk away. At the same time, it's as if
there's a 'set up' for shock to my emotional sysmten, becasue aparantly
my heart chakra is wide open, I seem to go around with it so open,
exposed, sensitive, so very full of soft, loving feelings, and when
someone is hurtful toward me, it just hits like a terrible stringing
dart. I guess soft is the word, I feel so very soft inside now. And the
walls, the shell, that once protected my heart, just aren't there any
more. There's good to that, but also not so good. I'm more caring and
sensitive to others' needs and hurts, but at the same time, my own heart
is wide open to hurtful darts.
>
>
> However, my perceptions since are .. altered. The walls are glowing.
Walls?
>
> >> Blessings..
> >> and Blessings to you, Sister,
> >Jenell
> :) Blessed be! Thank Goddess for the comfort of shared experience..
>
> Mystress Angelique Serpent, http://www.domin8rex.com
> Vancouver, B.C., Canada. Officially the most beautiful city in the world.
> 8) :D ;) :0 :) ;P ;) :D |* ;) 8D :)
> <<<< I would rather live in a world where my life is surrounded by mystery
> <<<< than live in a world so small that my mind could comprehend it.
> <<<< -- Harry Emerson Fosdick
>
>
>
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