To: K-list
Recieved: 1999/11/10 05:34
Subject: Re: [K-list] Tibetan memories
From: Adele Chatelain
On 1999/11/10 05:34, Adele Chatelain posted thus to the K-list:
Hi Amanda,
You asked about Clear Light. I don't pretend to be an
expert, but here goes:
There are four subtle kinds of consciousness:
(l) The mind of White Appearance
(2) The mind of red increase
(3) The mind of black near-attainment
(4) Clear light
These 'minds' occur spontaneously at death, or as a result
of
successful inner fire (tummo) meditation when the airs
(energies)
have been absorbed in the central channel.
A yogi or yogini can use these subtle minds to realize
nonduality
(oneness).
Like any kind of 'knowing' it's hard to explain in words.
It
might be easier to understand if you know that Tibetan
Buddhists
believe that everything (all matter) is made up of Light;
nothing
truly exists from it's own side (meaning, if you were to
break
down matter to it's basic component---you'd end up with
Light).
You can find out more about Clear Light if you read any
book on the SIX YOGAS OF NAROPA (a Kagyu tradition text)
where
they emphasize Clear Light (and also they emphasize Dream
Yoga).
You seem to be drawn to the Kagyu tradition from your
questions.
After that K. experience, my life turned around completely:
for one thing, going back to Philadelphia, on the train
after
the Initiation in NYC, I had a vision that my father was
going to
die soon. Now, he was never sick a day in his life---he was
82 years
old at the time. Because of that vision, I immediately had
a one-
woman show of my art work, which is what my father always
wanted
me to do. Ironically, when he was dying when I was having
my Opening Night, he was the only member of my family who
remembered
I was having the Show. He died shortly thereafter.
So, clairvoyance became a part of my life after the K.
experience.
Also, pain became something I could tolerate. From the age
of
40 to 50 I had migraines that medication could not stop.
They
were hereditary; my grandmother hand them from age 40-50,
too. I would
have to call in sick for three days a month because I spent
that
time throwing up and wracked with pain ( I even had a
special
sleeping bag made so that I could stay in the bathroom all
night).
The pain was horrible. I figured out afterwards that I
spend
a total of one entire year of my life throwing up!
After the K. experience, the pain didn't go away. BUT I had
patience to endure it. And I learned somehow to offer up
the
pain to others, as a 'sacrifice'.
I no longer was interested in the art world, but then became
a spritual artist and teacher, which is what I do today, in
addition to my everyday job which pays for the roof over my
head.
Energy: from then on I could regulate the amounts of my
energy. If I get tired, I know I can visualize the 'winds'
going into my central channel, energizing me....to help
others.
I developed a sense of depth to my personality that I didn't
have before and aquired a sense of urgency to help others.
Beforehand, I existed for myself and my friends. AFter the
experience, I no longer existed for me but for 'God' within
me.
It gave me tremendous inner strength to guide others---which
sometimes means not always being 'nice' but knowing when to
exert terseness when necessary (some times being 'nice' only
helps others to remain helpless).
You asked me about the Deity initiation: Like most
followers
of Tibetan Buddhism, I've had many initiations:
Heruka/Vajrayogini--
(which included certain aspects of CHOD):Dorje Sempa, etc.
However, I
am most fond of the Kalachakra initiation. The complexity
of
the visuals involved seem to satisfy my
artistic/visualization side.
K. yoga according to the Tibetan tradition is called Tummo
or "Inner Fire". It consists of regulating and retaining
the
breath in particular ways, using the central channel and the
two side channels. It's the 'Heart Practice of the Six
Yogas
of Naropa" as I mentioned earlier.
After sometimes years of purifying oneself through many
virtuous
acts, one begins to learn what's called the Vase Breathing
meditations (holding one's breath while pulling inward
abdomen
and rectal muscles). After practicing this for a long time
and being able to concentrate on the 'Drop' of white-red
color at the Heart Chakra you learn how to send this
drop through the various chakras up and down the central
channel, while remaining in total concentration. This is
the hard part; the concentration. Most of us have to learn
how
to maintain this over time.
The key is concentration, so one must start very slowly.
If one doesn't practice in this way----SLOWLY----and with
a guide, one can bring up only chaos and physical and mental
pain.
The feeling is one of complete bliss, much beyond any
orgasmic feeling one experiences in ordinary or even
extra-ordinary sex. BUT this
bliss is ALWAYS accomplished so that one can SERVE other
beings better. It is NEVER done for the experience of it
or for any other superficial reason.
Finally, this practice ALWAYS ends with sending the benefits
to all living beings in all the Universes, human and
non-human.
I left a lot out because it really can cause havoc. I was
lucky
in that for about 20 years I couldn't find a teacher so I
had
to practice only a little bit since my knowledge was
zilch---
this protected me, along with an awful K. experience in the
late sixties; after that I vowed always to go very slowly.
I want to say I really don't know much about K./Tummo. What
happened to me was a great blessing in that it happened
rather spontaneously. It humbled me and made me realize how
much I really DON'T know.
If you want to read more about it, there's a wonderful book
called THE BLISS OF INNER FIRE by Lama Thubten Yeshe
Wisdom Pub. Boston. 1998.
Lots of hugs to everyone,
Adele
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