To: K-list
Recieved: 1999/10/29 09:30
Subject: Re: [K-list] Conversation With A Psychologist
From: kim fisher
On 1999/10/29 09:30, kim fisher posted thus to the K-list:
Adele,
Your reply here is "very" well stated. In the mist of
us all that have or are still in the battles of
dealing with depressions in ones life.
My learnings on this matter back 3 years ago I was
taught quite a bit. For speaking on my "past"
experience. I was living off what one can call a very
larger "ego" trip. Of no one could get up on my
mountain it was all "mine".
Well as I have learned mountains crumble and fall, and
the "can be moved.
Understaning that there are so many different
depressions in life that we have to and may still have
to deal with.
At the time, mine took me way back, back to my
childhood in which I had no clue that my childhood was
affected. In other words I was guided to a "cleaning
of my closet".
Pulling out "all" that I had hidden so very well and I
did not realizze that I had taken this "extra baggage"
with me into my adult years.
I destroyed realtionships, and broke quite a few
dreams the way I look back at it now if I had it to go
through again I would because what I had learned to
let go of now allows me to "freely" release it to let
another know that it can and will always be overcome.
When we can stand "face to face" with ourselves and
expose the hidden deep secrets that we try to hide we
allow ourselves to surrender from here and open up to
there "next levels".
I do understand that there are others out there that
may state that this may sound to you like a simple
case of depression that I had faced back then, But let
me state this in all truth: When you get to the point
of your life to where you are really ready to check
out (take your own life) as I was back then, it is not
a simple case.
So since I have been at that point of my life and
"over came it" with GODs Grace I can relate.
Sometimes one can walk around the big world thinking
that nothing can ever touch us: this was may wrong
path I was on back then.
When my as I call it "True Awakening" happened 3 years
ago at home I was at the state of exiting.
For we all have different experiences of of
"awakenings" I choose to share mine with all, my whole
home filled with a bright light and so many different
colors appeared I thought I was loosing my mind at the
time.
Before me stood 2 persons one in white another in an
indian outfit this is the best way I can describe it.
The person in white reach out a hand to me and I put
my hand in theirs.
I next found myself in a very big room with with
pilars as white as snow and very huge around. The
room was filled with incense the color of this room
was purple in lights, before me were stairs, white
they led up I walked up the stairs I saw feet with
sandles on and legs I could not lift my head up higher
to look at whom was sitting in the chair my head would
not allow me to do that.
I sat down at the feet and rested my head on the leg
(yes I knew where I was). At that moment everything
inside of me melted away, I was only there for a few
mins. But to me it felt like a liftime.
I found myself back home in my own surroundings as I
sat there in total awe of what just happened I heard a
voice say to me----(I am going to show you the perfect
Love".
In this experience my life was changed, I have been
taught by my guides on my "K" power GOD have blessed
me with healing abilities, Others that have a very
high attunement can see the "gold" coil on my head.
My aura in "K" is purple and white but mostly purple
when in deep prayer the whole room fills with purple
what I call swirls.
I just wanted to share just a very small portion with
all out here on the "K" list. This is part of a true
life testomony of my "Awakening" to whom I am in
Christ.
Thank you for taking the time to read it.
When we can get past of "egos" our true selves are
revealed to us, I can say it this way this is a mere
part of when I let go I woke up.
I Can only see this world now with the 3rd eye.
Blessings to all,
Kim (aka Allahundra)
--- Adele Chatelain <chatelaaATnospamwharton.upenn.edu>
wrote:
> Hi, David,
> You brought up an interesting point re:
> psychotherapy and
> depression.
> I believe the psychotherapist you spoke to was
> referring
> to
> 'cognitive thereapy'. Actually, speaking for
> experience,
> there's
> a good reason for using 'thinking' to get some
> people out of
> their depression.
> When I was about 13 to the age of 25 I suffered
> from
> severe
> depression. Back then, there were no drugs to help
> anyone
> out
> of depression. Looking back on it, I'm very glad
> there
> wasn't,
> although I certainly was suicidal. ( I have to say
> I'm 53
> years
> old, now, so you can put this statement in
> perspective).
> Anyway, my problem was in my thinking patterns.
> I looked
> at events in my life as 'half empty' rather than
> 'half
> full'.
> In short, my thinking was negative (I saw the
> negative in
> everything),
> and consequently, I was very cynical. And if anyone
> told me
> that
> (that I looked at things negatively, I'd find
> reasons why
> the
> event/thing WAS negative! No one could pry me out
> of that
> self-
> destructive way of looking at life).
>
> Bit by bit, sentence by sentence, I had to
> delineate and
> take
> apart and look at my thinking patterns. Then I had
> to look
> at the fact there were
> other ways of seeing the same thing, and in not such
> a
> negative
> fashion.
> By the way, this process is exactly what Buddhist
> Meditation
> does; you are taught to slow down the thinking
> processes to
> a
> point you can see their cause and effect.
> At first I was very negative about the process!
> Small
> wonder.
> I spent the first part of my life, for whatever
> reason,
> training
> my mind to be negative. It was going to take just as
> long
> to unravel the thinking-mess.
> I also observed how I assumed a lot about what
> other
> people thought,
> did, said. Not only did I do that, but then I
> assumed the
> outcome
> of what I assumed they were thinking; in short I
> took what
> I THOUGHT THEY WERE THINKING as reality, ....and
> then acted
> upon
> that . I had to stop doing that. After all, we
> really
> don't
> know what goes on in another's mind and heart.
>
> Once I started to retrain the tape-recorder of my
> brain....I
> found (very slightly at first) my depression
> lifting.
>
> By the time I was 25 years old, the depression
> was
> totally lifted.Now,
> I have to do certain things, in addition to looking
> at my
> thoughts,
> however (and that was part of the 'thinking'
> process, too).
> For
> example, I make sure I eat three meals a day to keep
> my
> sugar
> and electrolyte levels stable. I make certain I get
> enough
> sleep.
> I make certain I take time, every day, for MYSELF,
> as well
> as for others. And I
> meditate every day. And I don't drink any alcohol.
>
> I haven't had a depression episode since.
> However, when
> I
> turned 40, everyone around me warned me of
> menopausal
> depression.
> I never got it. I am convinced it's because my
> thinking
> process
> is now, finally HEALTHY. Yes, I still get
> sad---that's
> normal---
> but no longer depressed. And because I no longer get
> depressed,
> I experience the whole gamut of emotions...but they
> are
> regulated;
> no more the emotional roller-coaster rides I used to
> take.
>
> Now, I'm not saying all depressed people would
> benefit
> from
> cognitive therapy. But for me, it was just
> wonderful. I
> only
> went through the therapy a few short years. What I
> learned
> in
> those years, I could apply to my own thinking
> patterns to
> lift
> myself out of the depression.
>
> Cognitive therapy combined with Buddhist
> meditation is
> about
> the healthiest thing I ever did in my life. I can
> now
> weather
> emotional storms both from the outside (from others)
> and
> from
> my own creating! :-)
>
> Anyway....Lots of special hugs to those of whom
> are
> plagued
> with depression.
>
> Love,
> Adele
>
=====
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