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To: K-list
Recieved: 1999/05/01 16:37
Subject: Re: [K-list] Too Pleasant
From: molecularbreeze

On 1999/05/01 16:37, molecularbreeze posted thus to the K-list:


-----Original Message-----
From: v <madammumATnospamptialaska.net>
To: nancy <nancyATnospamwtp.net>
Cc: kundaliniATnospamList-Server.net <kundaliniATnospamList-Server.net>
Date: Saturday, May 01, 1999 1:18 PM
Subject: Re: [K-list] Too Pleasant

> I live up the hill from the homeless shelter, & look down at them
>smoking their ciggy butts outside occasionally. And here I am in a big
>spacious apartment with plenty of food & computers & televisions, a
>darling daughter,
>warmth & a well fed cat!

Dear V,

I hope you can know you deserve to have these things. I mean could it be
that there is still a leftover guilt or shame tape telling you that you
don't deserve to be comfortable, at or at ease? You sound like you are in
balance as far as the effort you are putting forth in relation to what you
are receiving. I am overcoming the playing out of a childhood mechanism
whereby, I have lived my life feeling normal when I extend myself greatly in
struggle and chaos (i.e. relationships) and receive little. I am in a
period of withdrawl and healing quiet, trying to feel my feelings (etc.) and
sometimes I still feel the compulsion to create a sort of drama or chaos for
myself as if I am being lazy. Just a thought for you.

Connie

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