To: K-list
Recieved: 1999/01/04 18:55
Subject: [K-list] The Woman Who Realized God (for you Harsha)
From: Leteegee

Many here on this list and in the world have 'Realized God' during their peak
Kundalini experiences. What does that mean (to me?)? Well I certainly
expected to come back from the mountaintop enlightened. I thought 'I made
it'. I was crushed to learn I was the same ol' unenlightened person with the
same ol' problems after coming back. The first enlightened thing I did was
give up expectations since they didn't work most the time anyway. (it was a
start...)

I recall my first thoughts after my three-hour tour of Heaven...
"Like_Oh_My_Gawd! It doesn't matter if I smoke! It doesn't matter if I
listen to Johnny Mathis music!" (I thought I had to act in certain ways and
listen to newagey music to make it to God.) This may seem silly, but these
were things I loved, but felt I had to 'sacrifice' to get to God.

Although I mourned and grieved for this place for many moons, I've finally
come to understand, from my limited but hopefully open-minded understanding,
that when we make a decision for God, for Love, for enlightenment, we are at
some point, given a glimpse of the mountaintop. We don't get left up top the
mountain to my dismay... just a glimpse or glimpses. It may come in many
different forms.

I had to ask myself why are we thrown off the mountaintop... why can't we stay
tHere? And I say 'thrown off' as when I got back to what I had always
considered 'normal', it seemed like hell. Add a little psychosis and a lot of
fear and I think this is called a 'bad kundalini awakening'. LOL

I finally accepted I was in hell and decided to co-create Heaven on Earth for
myself. (...On Earth as it is in Heaven...)

I began using the principles I saw and knew from that glimpse into Heaven....
"Nothing really matters... Everything is the same". I saw that everything is
ONLY light - everything - and ALL open to perceptions. God is truly
everything and every where!

I now have the option (that I didn't know I had before) of being open to look
at people & situations differently - from a vision of Love instead of fear.
It has been a slow process remembering to use this option on a regular basis,
but I'm finding it is coming closer and closer together. Our free will to me
is a willingness to shift our perception to one of Love. And I've learned our
spiritual friends are here to help remind us when we forget. (thank you!)

Seeing the 'hell' I made for myself was quite an eye-opener. Every area of my
life was completely unbalanced. I can imagine that if one was balanced in
your mental, physical, emotional, and spiritual prior to the glimpse, you
*could* come back enlightened. I don't know - just a guess, as I'm sure you
wouldn't have as far to fall. Or to climb back up.

Still Climbing... (no wonder I'm so damn tired all the time)
xxxtg

* Men are from Earth. Women are from Earth. Deal with it. *

DISCLAIMER!

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