1998/07/01 08:56
kundalini-l-d Digest V98 #491
kundalini-l-d Digest Volume 98 : Issue 491
Today's Topics:
Re: I need help! [ "jim privacy" <jprivacyATnospamhotmail.com ]
Re: i need help! [ Delirium <deliriumATnospamfull-moon.com> ]
Re: love is... [ "Lobster" <lobsterATnospamdial.pipex.com> ]
Re: Cloud control: [ "Lobster" <lobsterATnospamdial.pipex.com> ]
Re: I need help! [ Nancy <NancyATnospamwtp.net> ]
RE: I gotta scream [ "Jose Arroyo" <jm_arroyoATnospamhotmail.co ]
Re: Faces of god [ "Jose Arroyo" <jm_arroyoATnospamhotmail.co ]
Online Marketing [ kimbATnospamepage.com ]
Date: Tue, 30 Jun 1998 23:27:28 PDT
From: "jim privacy" <jprivacyATnospamhotmail.com>
To: debhATnospammindspring.com
Cc: kundalini-lATnospamlists.execpc.com
Subject: Re: I need help!
Message-ID: <19980701062730.1764.qmailATnospamhotmail.com>
Content-Type: text/plain
Dear Dhyani:
I haven't had an experience exactly like this, but some elements are
familiar. Here's my interpretation, for what it's worth. (If you
don't like it, I'll refund every penny!)
>Well, I think I also mentioned that even before I opened the door and
saw him, all of my chakras opened simultaneously and I heard the words
in my head say "He's here". I had an intense feeling of certainty about
this man that I could not explain. As I talked to him I also said I
kept hearing the word "gift" in my head. It felt as if God was giving
me a gift.<
*** This part sound like a deep inner "knowing;" normally you would
trust this inner "voice" or feeling. You *did* trust this inner knowing,
at least until your mind got agitated and you started listening to that
mind chatter: thoughts and doubts, thoughts and fears, even "paranoia"
as you described it. You got several profound signals at once that this
was a gift from God, then later listened to all your doubts and fears
instead.
In my experience, this level of agitation and fear comes from mind being
cleansed. Ego is inherently fear-based: the original sense of
separation, fear of annhhilation, etc. My guess is you are experiencing
fear, agitation and paranoia as k is clearing these out of your system;
this stuff has to be experienced as it's being released. Your mind is
being purified, and the process is very disorienting and unpleasant,
even painful when emotions are this strong. In some disciplines, these
are called kriyas.
Bob's physical resemblance to David is a clever way for spirit to
trigger those buried emotions about David so you can face them and deal
with them. You'll have to fill in the blanks here, I don't know the
story about David. This may be part of the "gift."
I wouldn't over-react to the word "sweetheart" just yet. Is he just
flirting a little and misunderstood your intentions? Big deal. I don't
know what part of the country you/he are from, but here in the South the
waitresses call everyone Sweetie, Sugar, Hon, and Sweetheart, and it
doesn't mean a thing. I got into the habit as well, and experienced
culture shock when I travelled to New England and female co-workers took
my words literally. Oops. Point is, more than one explanation, fairly
benign, don't over-react.
I'm no Ann Landers, but would it be OK to talk to this guy and exlain (a
little) of your discomfort and agitation? If no reassurance from him,
you can always listen to your fears and tell him to stay away. Sometimes
fear is early warning system, great protection (see book, "The Gift of
Fear" by Gavin de Becker).
But based on my past experiences with overwhelming fear, and only
knowing what you have written, my interpretation is that your mind is
undergoing a purification process. I would re-focus on the original deep
sense of calm knowing as true, and learn to trust that "voice" over the
fearful mind.
See if this resonates as truthful and fits for you. Hope I've been
helpful.
Love, -Jim
original message:
>From kundalini-l-requestATnospamlists.execpc.com Tue Jun 30 20:00:36 1998
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>Date: Tue, 30 Jun 1998 22:30:27 -0400
>To: kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com
>From: "Dhyani \"Debbie\"" <debhATnospammindspring.com>
>Subject: I need help!
>
>
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>
>I know I said in my last email I was getting off this list. I still
want
>to if it continues with irrelevant chatter but I am torn because I
really
>need somewhere to go with these experiences.
>
>In one of my last postings I mentioned I had met a man who looked
exactly
>like the man who triggered by kundalini experience five years ago.
Well, I
>think I also mentioned that even before I opened the door and saw him,
all
>of my chakras opened simultaneously and I heard the words in my head
say
>"He's here". I had an intense feeling of certainty about this man that
I
>could not explain. As I talked to him I also said I kept hearing the
word
>"gift" in my head. It felt as if God was giving me a gift.
>
>Anyway, I called him the next day and asked him for his birth
information
>and mentioned it seemed we had some interesting similarities: we have
both
>been through legal hell at the hands of my ex-husband (his wife used my
ex
>as an attorney to screw him over). Then I asked if he wanted to get
>together and continue the conversation and he said he would call me
next week.
>
>Well, since I saw him, my energy has been going crazy. The energy is
>rushing through me very quickly and I can't seem to bring myself down.
I
>have been eating meat, walking in the woods and laying on the earth,
>sleeping, writing, drawing but nothing works. I don't feel psychically
ill
>as I have from some people's energy but it feels as if I have a very
dense
>rod that feels like steel going down the front of my body. It feels so
>strong and intense that it seems I might be able to push it through the
>wall (I have not tried to do this).
>
>I want the energy to stop but I can't make it go away.
>I have also been feeling intensely paranoid since I spoke with him on
the
>phone. I am thinking now that maybe he misinterpreted why I wanted his
>birth data since I did not really explain myself and he called me
>"sweetheart" at the end of the conversation. I was so stunned by this
I
>didn't even respond. I just tried to call him at home tonight to make
>certain he did not misunderstand my intentions. A woman answered the
>phone. I don't even know if he is married and now I feel so freaked
out
>that I am even showing any interest in him as a friend. She said she
would
>give him the message but he didn't call back.
>
>I am thinking of cancelling this man from doing my glass block windows
on
>the 16th of July unless he calls me back. I am so paranoid about
meeting
>new people. I have been living in a cave for the past five years since
the
>kundalini energy began. I spent three years in a state of deep grief
over
>David's death from another life and this new man, Bob, could be his
>identical twin. I do not know how to handle this. I could also just
be
>extremely paranoid right now. The woman who answered the phone could
be
>his daughter (he told me he runs his business with her - she's 20).
And
>maybe he has just been too busy to call back.
>
>Can anyone else relate to this level of paranoia about meeting new
people,
>especially ones who light up all you chakras and look like someone you
>might have known in another life? I'm sure no one can match all these
>circumstances but I would like some reassurance right now. I honestly
have
>nobody I can talk to anymore about this stuff.
>
>Dhyani
>
>
______________________
Get Your Private, Free Email at http://www.hotmail.com
Date: Wed, 01 Jul 1998 02:01:54 +0100
From: Delirium <deliriumATnospamfull-moon.com>
To: kundalini-lATnospamlists.execpc.com
CC: debhATnospammindspring.com
Subject: Re: i need help!
Message-ID: <35998A49.212C485AATnospamfull-moon.com>
Content-Type: text/plain; charset=us-ascii; x-mac-type="54455854"; x-mac-creator="4D4F5353"
Debbie wrote:
> I know I said in my last email I was getting off this list. I still want
> to if it continues with irrelevant chatter but I am torn because I really
> need somewhere to go with these experiences.
>
If you're in need right now, you might be just really frustrated with not seeing
stuff on the list that helps you directly...
I'd say hang in here and take what you want, discard the rest...
that is, after taking a few nice deep breaths and counting to ten really slow!
And as to the fellow you have made contact
with, all I can say is that if you have
any questions about him, maybe instead of
running for the hills you can maybe call
a sort of time-out, a cooling period, give
yourself a couple weeks or whatever to see
if it was a trustworthy gut instinct or just
a freakout because of all the major
coincidences...
You sound like you're running a whole lot of
wild energy right now, and it might be that
this energy is messing with your intuition,
so backing off a bit might really help. Just
get some more grounding exercises and give
yourself some time...after all, if this was a
past life deal it ain't gonna resolve itself
instantly!
Also, if you would feel less threatened and
still want to make face-to-face contact why
not arrange to meet this guy but in a safe
surrounding...where *you will feel safe*
(perhaps acquaintances that you trust will be
near you...)
Sounds like there's tons of emotional baggage
(and maybe...likely even, some hefty sexual
charge on the relationship (of the past life)
and it might take some time to deal with it
all. Whatever you do, relax and remember that
it's the right thing for you right now.
Brightest, calmest blessings to you, Debbie!
--Kath
Date: Wed, 1 Jul 1998 02:53:28 +0100
From: "Lobster" <lobsterATnospamdial.pipex.com>
To: "Mystress Angelique Serpent" <serpentATnospamdomin8rex.com>
Cc: "Dan Margolis" <dmargolisATnospamabm.com>, <kundalini-lATnospamlists.execpc.com>
Subject: Re: love is...
Message-ID: <000c01bda4c2$98c993c0$da4995c1ATnospamdefault>
Content-Type: text/plain;
charset="iso-8859-1"
Lobster:
>>However the feel was very different to a malice email and I accept the
>>spirit of the meaning. It was a very wholesome post . . . certainly felt
>>that way . . .
Angelique:
> Did it? I am still unravelling your response.. But it seemed from some
>of your comments that you thought I was cranky, too. (shrug) Based on your
>previous experiences of me, that is not a surprising judgment. As you say,
>I have changed.
Lobster again:
mmm . . .
We are using the word 'cranky' separated by our common language. In colonial
English I believe the word is used primarily for someone who is irritated or
has a bad attitude over something. I was using it in a slightly different
sense of someone who is unusual in their attitudes - unconventional. In this
sense which I would apply to myself, to be a crank is to be unusual or
outside of the norm.
Angelique:
> I responded to Dan's post first coz it was simpler. Your earlier response
>is a maze of contradictions I have not yet managed to fathom. The
>suspicious part of me suspects you of dancing as fast as you can trying to
>baffle me with bullshit.. if so, then the rest of me wants to congratulate
>you on a job well done. I am quite baffled, finding the confusion rather
>pleasurable, and still trying to encompass your contradictory perspectives
>enough to respond.
What would I wish to confuse you for? What am I protecting? Sometimes in
order to create sense, I create a pattern.
Some people are too chaotic to provide such a possibility for them. They
would dance their way out of any reflection, any genuine response. The most
that can be done is shock them into silence and re-evaluation. However they
often forget every bit of councel they have ever heard and assume that such
behaviour is indicative of 'lack of wisdom' when it is dependent on their
lack. This idea is so offensive to peoples egos that they insist on all
kinds of underlying motives. When people go beyond their usual understanding
of real, right, kind and so on, they begin to recognise something that
corresponds to the genuine . . .
Angelique:
> I am not suspicious because I am openly Self serving, and Self serving
>motives are the only ones I trust. In every act of service I know that I am
>serving my Self.
It would be kinder to judge others by your highest ideal rather than their
lowest possibility.
> Mother Theresa was nice to lepers coz it made her feel good about who she
>was as a person, and expected eternal repayment in heaven for her kindness.
>The lepers appreciated it, too...
There was more depth than this. She attempted to see and find her ideal
(Christ) where others closed their eyes.
> Rather than the more common, but to my mind unrealistic and dangerous
>concept of giving "what somebody else needs" without expectation of return.
:-)
You and others have nothing I want or require. When people display wisdom I
wish to share in this. When wisdom exists there is no trading involved. In
other words wisdom can be found elsewhere. To try and create it is a service
not a reciprocal based interaction because quite often people want the
substance but do not relish the means.
Be Well,
Lobster
Date: Wed, 1 Jul 1998 03:05:35 +0100
From: "Lobster" <lobsterATnospamdial.pipex.com>
To: <TarmuzATnospamaol.com>
Cc: "Kundalini-L" <kundalini-lATnospamlists.execpc.com>
Subject: Re: Cloud control:
Message-ID: <000d01bda4c2$99ce80a0$da4995c1ATnospamdefault>
Content-Type: text/plain;
charset="iso-8859-1"
>It is better to lie about lies than to lie about truths...I also can only
lie
>as an earnest seeker of the truth...that is the best that any of us can
do...
If that is the best you can do, you should try to do better. Which liar told
you that you were an earnest seeker of truth? As you are dealing with a liar
what makes you think that it is not far better to tell the truth about lies,
so that people may recognise the lies about truth?
Be Well
Lobster
Date: Wed, 01 Jul 1998 06:54:12 -0600
From: Nancy <NancyATnospamwtp.net>
To: "Dhyani \"Debbie\"" <debhATnospammindspring.com>,
kundalini-1 <kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com>
Subject: Re: I need help!
Message-ID: <359A316E.8823D7C9ATnospamwtp.net>
Content-Type: text/plain; charset=us-ascii; x-mac-type="54455854"; x-mac-creator="4D4F5353"
Hi Dhyani,
What I write below is my opinion. These are the thoughts and impressions that
came to me when I read your message.
I know I have mentioned before that I have also met my twin flame or twin soul in
the past year. Throughout that time, I've struggled with the wild, whacky energy
within me. I'm not at peace with this yet, but I've personally made such strides.
That is the filter through which my comments are expressed.
> I know I said in my last email I was getting off this list. I still want
> to if it continues with irrelevant chatter but I am torn because I really
> need somewhere to go with these experiences.
Just like life, this list includes meaningful interaction and irrelevant chatter.
> In one of my last postings I mentioned I had met a man who looked exactly
> like the man who triggered by kundalini experience five years ago. Well, I
> think I also mentioned that even before I opened the door and saw him, all
> of my chakras opened simultaneously and I heard the words in my head say
> "He's here". I had an intense feeling of certainty about this man that I
> could not explain. As I talked to him I also said I kept hearing the word
> "gift" in my head. It felt as if God was giving me a gift.
When you meet a twin flame, it is a gift. It offers a growth opportunity, chance
to see your strengths and be confronted with your shadow. Perhaps this new man
will offer you some of the elements of interacting with your twin flame. Maybe
since he's not your twin, the interaction won't be quite as intense. From your
earlier description, it seemed like your interaction with your twin was too
intense for you to handle.
> Well, since I saw him, my energy has been going crazy. The energy is
> rushing through me very quickly and I can't seem to bring myself down. I
> have been eating meat, walking in the woods and laying on the earth,
> sleeping, writing, drawing but nothing works.
Someone told me recently that when we look for resolution, we are kidding
ourselves. There is no resolution in a situation such as this. There's letting go
and finding peace within. (*I* certainly don't have this one mastered!!!:-)
Sometimes you will feel crazy and then you will live through it and move toward a
new feeling. That in itself brings some peace. "Hey, I was absolutely crazy last
week and I survived!" (And I am testament that it can be done!)
> I want the energy to stop but I can't make it go away.
It can't go away until you deal with it. It's OK to feel...crazy, angry, sad,
happy, flat. Until the past year, I never knew I was such an emotionally
well-rounded person! [tee hee] What's helped me is finding some people who do
understand that I can talk to about my experience. People do care when we allow
them in to our lives.
> I am thinking of cancelling this man from doing my glass block windows on
> the 16th of July unless he calls me back.
If you do this, you'll never understand the gift. It will be OK, you'll see.
> I am so paranoid about meeting
> new people. I have been living in a cave for the past five years since the
> kundalini energy began. I spent three years in a state of deep grief over
> David's death from another life and this new man, Bob, could be his
> identical twin. I do not know how to handle this. I could also just be
> extremely paranoid right now.
My sense is that you are not paranoid but afraid to handle this array of emotions
that is being presented as a gift. I know I have really resisted this myself and
instead focused on the external, my twin. That's the gift of that relationship in
my life. I had a focal point so I could clearly see me.
Many might disagree with what I'm going to say about past lives: I think if there
truly are past lives, then that's where they should be--in the past. I think it
can be interesting to ponder these, but one shouldn't live there. Seems from your
posts that you have a tendency to go there rather than staying present.
Trust the universe! If you didn't figure something out in a past life, you will
undoubtedly have another chance to get it this time around. Why focus on grief of
another life when joy is here for you now?
> Can anyone else relate to this level of paranoia about meeting new people,
> especially ones who light up all you chakras and look like someone you
> might have known in another life? I'm sure no one can match all these
> circumstances but I would like some reassurance right now. I honestly have
> nobody I can talk to anymore about this stuff.
Everything won't always feel fine, but move forward anyway! You are encountering
a gift, Dhyani. Sometimes these gifts sure are a pain.... [grin]
Nancy
Date: Wed, 01 Jul 1998 06:32:19 PDT
From: "Jose Arroyo" <jm_arroyoATnospamhotmail.com>
To: kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com
Subject: RE: I gotta scream
Message-ID: <19980701133224.10327.qmailATnospamhotmail.com>
Content-Type: text/plain
>do believe evil chases. There are ways of using the energy and people
can
>send vibrations that cure and that make dissease. It is naive to think
>everything is great all the time because it is not. We are sort of in
How TRUE!
>between very powerful changes in the whole planet and there will be
peopl=
>e
>trying to mislead crowds of seekers.
>
For as long as they have 'followers' they will exercise great
destructive (hateful) powers.
The moment they run out of 'followers' they become as innocent as a
baby! (What a blessing to be a baby/youngster ! *smile*)
>I would like to share this exercise with you:
>
>Breathe in and picture how God=B4s are is cleansing your entire body.
The=
>n
>Breathe out and be aware of how impurities go away as they are. If you
fe=
>el
>like it, you can breathe the clean air through your nose and then, with
y=
>our
>eyes closed, exhale the impurities through your mouth and picture them
an=
>d
>let them out, send them away. They just go, out out you, someplace they
a=
>re
>well recieved (there is all kinds of things in this world).
>
>And remember: there is a power way stronger than what you call "me" it
is
>within you and withing everything else. If you accept that power as the
>creator-teacher-giver-lover-taker and you surrender your "me" with all
it=
>s
>history and concepts to the source that flows within you, then nothing
wi=
>ll
>harm you.
>
Roberto, thank you very much for reminding this.
A TRUTH message can always be denied but it will always be there,
whereever and whenever one is.
Love and Joy,
Jose
______________________
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Date: Wed, 01 Jul 1998 07:55:40 PDT
From: "Jose Arroyo" <jm_arroyoATnospamhotmail.com>
To: kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com
Subject: Re: Faces of god
Message-ID: <19980701145553.16610.qmailATnospamhotmail.com>
Content-Type: text/plain
>Hi.
>
>I am a little puzzled by there seeming to be a number of `god'
>experiences with seemingly different qualities.
>
You just said it; it seems... There is no certainty in 'seeming'...
Interprete it the way you wish.
If many would say that they are not puzzled about God, there would be a
lot of liars among them or they would be referring to another god.
Who knows? Probably they, you know, better than others for yourself.
There is a gigantic difference between thinking-of-knowing-it and
KNOWING-IT.
>About a week ago now I experienced peace, and the best word to
>describe it really was peace. A couple of days back I experienced a
>deep, refined emotion of great love, and the best word to describe it
>was love. And yesterday I was nowhere and the best way to refer to it
>would be to say it was a void of nothingness. And now I have in my
>mind some kind of sense of having no interest in anything other than
>basic necessities.
>
What are for you these 'basic necessities'?
>It /seems/ that in some way, these states do not necessarily coexist.
>They may overlap perhaps but they are different from each other. Some
>people speak of a God of darkness, some of a God of light. I used to
>always think of God as being light, and of there being `another side'
>with higher planes and so on. I am not sure if that isn't just a mind
Nor is the young child sure if monsters,boogey men, Santa Claus exist.
But, one day they (will) know ...
>trick. And I am wondering where love is or was. Does it feel different
>being /loved/ than to be the one that is loving? Being nothing was
Until one has not experienced LOVE one can at best fantasy about it.
All words,views etc. are valid for a description of a non-experienced
event.
The way I feel (love/LOVE) may and probably is different from how you
feel (it). As long as the sentiment is not the SAME does it matter for
you how I perceive feeling of it/IT?
It would be like asking me to taste for you how coffee/tee or something
else tastes... *smile*
All kind of views, perceptions, feelings experienced by human beings are
all genuine for it is their personal experience they are talking about,
independently how far away they may seem to be compared to another human
being.
<snip>
>different somehow. Are there other planes, or is that a fantasy? How
>is God really? What is he/she like? Light or dark, a feeling of love
>or an absence of all feelings? Behaving like all other parts of nature
>or having a different, unique, `consciousness' thing?
>
You asked: "How is God really?" ...
Not many, if any, is going to give you THE ANSWER.
However you may find an answer if you ask YOURSELF, or, if not...
why don't you ask HIM/HER. ALL THAT IS, in the infinite Knowledge, Love
(and all other (un)imaginable positive superlatives) is the ONE that
will give you THE ANSWER.
If one is searching for words one will find words, however if one
desires to find THE WORD, one may start searching differently then
before...
Love and Joy,
Jose
______________________
Get Your Private, Free Email at http://www.hotmail.com
Date: Wed, 1 Jul 1998 10:46:27 -0500 (CDT)
From: kimbATnospamepage.com
To: ATnospamexecpc.com
Subject: Online Marketing
Message-Id: <199807011546.KAA17096ATnospamc.mx.execpc.com>
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5,000 as well. Per 5,000 ATnospam $200.00.
5. Web Page Design
Let us create your web page, with state of the art design & graphics. To get started on this, you will need
to send us a proposal, either by email, fax, or snail mail. If possible please send us a competitive price so
we can work out and negotiate the web site to be designed.
6. Customized Graphics
We can customize any graphics you desire. For example do you need customized pictures, a company
logo, or any type of graphical illustration. We can do all. Contact us on what you need, and we will reply
with a price quote.
7. Bulk Email Software
We are distributors for one of the best bulk email packages out there. Express Mail Server transforms your
computer into a powerful mail server. Let us show you the benefits of this amazing software. As well, you
can receive a free 3-day fully-functional demo, which will give you time to actually try out the program
package. the program retails regularly for: $299, but if you mention this ad, we will give it to you for $225.
8. Web Page Maintenance
We also can maintain your web page, and make changes as you require them. The prices can be
negotiated on this. For further info. please email us, or phone us.
Do you have a deal to make with us?? Send us some info. on your proposal and we will look at it. If we
want to go from there, we will negotiate fairly.
We are always coming out with new services and products. Do you have any new ideas that we can add
to our extensive list of products/services. Drop us a line, and we will certainly look over it. If there's
something that's not here, we probably came out with it, or will come out with it. Just contact us and we
will see what we can do.
How to order or Contact us:
As stated above, prices are in US. Funds. We accept as payment, check, money order, or bank transfer.
For check's and money orders please send to our postal address. For bank transfer's please email, or
phone us, for further instructions.
To place an order, send a proposal, or to discuss anything with us:
Postal Address:
Estroco Technologies
32983 Wills Road
Wainfleet, Ontario, Canada
L0S 1V0
Email: xromaATnospamnetcom.ca
Phone/Fax: (905) 899-3508
Thanks for your attention and time
Note: if you don't wish to receive further mailings, please respond to our email address stating this, and you
will not receive any mailings from us or will not be place on any email lists, etc. You will just be transferred
to our permanent remove list, which will guarantee you receive no mailings form us, or any mailings form
lists sold by us.
DISCLAIMER!
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