1998/03/01 22:12
kundalini-l-d Digest V98 #159
kundalini-l-d Digest Volume 98 : Issue 159
Today's Topics:
Re: HRTZEN: Powerful mis-connections [ rtrevATnospamredsuspenders.com (Bob Trevit ]
Re: sitting between two chairs [ Jerry Katz <umbadaATnospamns.sympatico.ca> ]
NEW! kundalini_pATnospamonelist.com [ Mystress Angelique Serpent <mistres ]
Re: new list [ Mystress Angelique Serpent <mistres ]
Re: sitting between two chairs [ PEGLUMPKIN <PEGLUMPKINATnospamaol.com> ]
Drinking too much? Is this a side-ef [ Delirium <deliriumATnospamfull-moon.com> ]
continuing...stuff....about..my sit. [ "Cara McCormack" <caradeepaATnospamhotmail ]
another quest.. [ "Cara McCormack" <caradeepaATnospamhotmail ]
just ask [ David Bozzi <david.bozziATnospamsnet.net> ]
unscribe [ "Leonardi" <leonardiATnospamcentrin.net.id ]
Re: Drinking too much? Is this a sid [ "Roberto Gonzales del Valle" <rgvgATnospam ]
Re: HRTZEN: Powerful mis-connections [ Gloria Greco <lodpressATnospamintercomm.co ]
Re: Drinking too much? Is this a sid [ john light <ozgpATnospamyahoo.com> ]
Date: Sun, 01 Mar 1998 16:23:12 -0500
From: rtrevATnospamredsuspenders.com (Bob Trevithick)
To: lodpressATnospamintercomm.com
Cc: anandajyoti <anandajyotiATnospamgeocities.com>, HeartzenATnospamlistserv.servtech.com,
kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com
Subject: Re: HRTZEN: Powerful mis-connections for night training
Message-ID: <34f9cff7.17024036ATnospammail.redsuspenders.com>
On Sun, 01 Mar 1998 10:57:49 +0100, you wrote:
>GG
>Thank you I will watch my mouse and see if I'm doing something that I'm
>not noticing. I appreciate the input because I know everyone doesn't
>want to have all those words coming through. Is it possible somehow that
>my program is corrupted or something also, or you just think it might be
>something I'm doing and not realizing it. That sounds possible. Thanks
>>
Hi Gloria,
I would suggest that since you've been successfully posting for a long
time, it's unlikely that you've suddenly forgotten how to do it
correctly. It's *possible* that you've developed a twitch in your
mouse finger, but I wouldn't bet on it. :-)
It could be that your mail program has become corrupted in some way.
You might want to reinstall it and see if that helps.
It could be that your ISP is having some kind of odd problem that is
duplicating posts. Calling them and describing your problem might be
useful.
It could be that some other node along the route is having problems,
and in that case there probably isn't much you can do except wait and
hope they fix it.
I haven't noticed any multiple postings from you, beyond the fact that
you often cross-post to both the K list and the HeartZen list, and
being on both lists I therefore get two copies. But that's normal
behavior.
Hope this helps...
Love,
Bob
--
Bob Trevithick
rtrevATnospamredsuspenders.com
Date: Sun, 01 Mar 1998 18:04:49 -0800
From: Jerry Katz <umbadaATnospamns.sympatico.ca>
To: frans <fransATnospamtelebyte.nl>, kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com
Subject: Re: sitting between two chairs
Message-ID: <34FA13C1.C4BATnospamns.sympatico.ca>
>frans wrote:
>
> things different... that's ME! And still no book in the bookshop
> about ME. Who am I? I hope i didn't add confusion! Frans.
Dear Frans,
When I was going through some confusion days about 20 years ago, I felt
Rajneesh's books were books about ME.
I too have loved the transcribed talks (he wrote little) of Osho
(Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh). How can you not love someone who took his
devotees' money and purchased some three dozen brand new Rolls Royces
that were rarely if ever driven?
Do you think he was trying to make a statement about materiality, the
focus of our mind's attention and the stupidity of everything that we
value, the futility of valuing anything at all, including mind itself?
(How do you value Truth or Ultimate Reality?) -- and that the smiling
Guru apparently resides in the midst of this insanity, waiting for your
submission to Him or Her?
Your comments tell me you have read Meditation: The Art of Ecstasy, one
of the great spiritual books ever.
Another of Rajneesh's books, The Mystic Experience (hard to find, it
never came out in paperback), is over 500 pages of transcribed talks
given in 1970 about kundalini. It was published in Hindi in 1971, and
came out in English in 1977. Its seams burst with intelligent and
truthful statements about kundalini, meditation, the human body.
If you are familiar with his Dynamic Meditation, Step Three involves the
inward asking of the question, Who am I? or Hoo, in The Mystic
Experience he says to take your pick. Are you familiar with that?
I'll close with a quote form The Mystic Experience: regarding the
awakening of kundalini energy...'Many things can happen. Each one of us
can have our distinct experiences, and these should not cause any
anxiety or fear.'
In 1970 that was revelatory. Rajneesh (Osho) strongly advised his
devotees not to reveal their experiences to anyone but himself. Rajneesh
also predicted that the future would be populated by millions of Buddhas
or enlightened ones.
I think the very beginning of those Enlightenment Days are upon us now.
Therefore, Frans, although there is not Osho to go to, there are many,
many others, each with a unique angle on how to get through and beyond
where you are now. You are about to meet some.
I just wanted to add some Osho or Rajneesh inspired support.
Best to you,
Jerry
http://www3.ns.sympatico.ca/umbada
P.S. Write me if you want details on Dynamic Meditation. I also have a
copy of The Orange Book: The Meditation Techniques of Rajneesh. It is
another hard to find Rajneesh title with the funniest, wierdest, but
mostly utterly sensible meditation techniques! Anybody want to hear
about some of them?
Date: Sun, 01 Mar 1998 12:44:23
From: Mystress Angelique Serpent <mistressATnospamdomin8rex.com>
To: kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com
Subject: NEW! kundalini_pATnospamonelist.com
Message-Id: <3.0.1.16.19980301124423.6b8fd394ATnospamdomin8rex.com>
Content-Type: text/plain; charset="us-ascii"
Hiya:
Ask and ye shall receive... I have built it ...
(on the ashes of the other two.. <www.coollist.com> wasn't working
out.. <www.onelist.com> is much better. Thanks, J. :) )
...will you come?? It is open for membership.
There's no "experts", yet.. just 5 members so far :) but 'when the
student is ready, the teacher appears'. I am sure the "experts" will be
drawn by Divine guidance answering the call of need.
Sometimes if you simply share your experience of difficulty, spirit moves
another awakened one to provide the solution.. the voice of Spirit is a
qualification not to be underestimated. The healing power of K-fire is why
the cadeuceus is a symbol of fully awakened K.
"Wherever two or more are gathered".. works in cyberspace.
The shiny brand new kundalini-p list is decribed thus:
<<<The spiritual and evolutionary process known as Kundalini awakening
can be joyous or harrowing to those undergoing it. Many esoteric
philosophies suggest ignoring all psychic and physical phenomena and
staying focused on the goal: enlightenment and self-realization.
This list community views the destination as being ultimately in the
hands of Spirit, and focuses instead on sharing thoughts on the beauty and
discomforts along the journey. The destination is universal, the paths to
It are individual: religous intolerance and prosetlyzing are discouraged.
Here awakened travellers of all paths may meet in harmony to share tales of
thier adventures, and to assist fellow travellers who may be encountering
difficulties along the way. The joy is in the journey.>>>
Subscribe yourself to this new list at
http://www.onelist.com/subscribe.cgi/kundalini_p
Welcome.. Blessings, Mystress.
(on K_P duty?? Oy, leadership and service..LOL!)
Mystress Angelique Serpent,
Dominant Experiential Facilitator.
Website= http://www.domin8rex.com/serpent
:D ;) :0 :) ;P :0 ;) :D :0 :) ;P :0 ;) :)
I would rather live in a world where my life is surrounded by mystery
than live in a world so small that my mind could comprehend it.
-- Harry Emerson Fosdick
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Vancouver, B.C., Canada. Officially the most beautiful city in the world.
Date: Sun, 01 Mar 1998 15:01:47
From: Mystress Angelique Serpent <mistressATnospamdomin8rex.com>
To: Druout <DruoutATnospamaol.com>
Cc: jtheinenATnospamhotmail.com, kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com
Subject: Re: new list
Message-Id: <3.0.1.16.19980301150147.0f47586aATnospamdomin8rex.com>
Content-Type: text/plain; charset="us-ascii"
At 23:36 28/02/98 EST, Druout wrote:
>Oh dear. Why fragment ourselves? Can't we just have an ongoing Subject:
>SYMPTOMS!
>
>I find it a bit difficult to separate the physical from the philosophical.
>
>Love, Hillary
>
>
>
Hello...
At this time, there are 370 people on the K.list, I think, that is a
large enough group that some side groups forming to talk about less popular
subjects in another location, won't be fragmentary.
My perspective of a moments inspiration, is, that you have created this,
dear Hillary, with your best intentions.
You wanted to take some surveys, which have been interesting.
You wanted to save bandwidth, so you asked folks to respond yes or no,
and not elaborate on their experience.
The best way to save bandwidth really, would have been to have the
yes/no responses sent to you direct, and post the results.. the numbers.
That might also have given you a bigger response, as more lurkers would
have participated confidentially.
The result was that your questions served to get folks puzzling about
their experience, and wanting to share more, but feeling constrained from
doing so.. by your request.. so eventually this restrained energy built to
where they wanted a separate forum. I am pleased with this result, as there
are topics which puzzle me, like the aliens in my mirror, which are
unpoular here.
Yes, I saw this happening, and no, I have deliberately not spoken of it
before, because I saw you taking on a leadership role, and the learning
curve of leadership, is experiential. It is by exploring and seeing
results. Discerning if the results are what you want, and changing strategy
if they are not.
I tend this garden with a gentle hand, mostly letting things grow as they
will..
I speak now because you are balking at your creation.. to reassure you
that your actions were in the highest good, for your personal growth, and
the growth of the list.. the birth of it's second offspring.. or third..
The K-list has children named K-sex and Kundalini_p.. and from the
sidetalking, I finally got around to creating K-goddess for verrry kinky
K-folks like myself, who are exploring unity thru rituals of
extremempolarity, and those who respond ecstatically BDSM shamanism content
of my website.
I found the posts from those who elaborated on your yes/no questions,
with tales of their personal experiences, to be the most interesting to
read.. it is the emotional and growth content of experiences which makes
them most interesting reading and meat for discusion.
This is a discussion list.. and a yes/no survey is not really a
discussion, is it? Many of your questions are similar to the ones members
are invited to answer of their experience, in the list intro. Sharing such
is the list's purpose.
You could learn the likely results of your survey by checking the "new
member" intro's in the archives. Especially the subject header "Re:
AutoPost from Kundalini Resource Center".
It would not have the same immediacy, tho, as "live" answers from current
members whom you can question further. However, it would likely shape your
perspectives of the width and breadth of Kundalini manifestations, more
fully than yes/no answers can.
If you need more info, feel free to write to me at
kundalini-l-ownerATnospamexecpc.com
Love and electric blue K. fire, List Mystress.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Website <http://www.execpc.com/~libra/kund/kundgate.htm>
in europe <http://www.telebyte.nl/~frans/kundalini/>
**Unsubbing: http://aloha.net/~bpeay/kundalini/unsubscribe.html
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*******************************
Date: Sun, 1 Mar 1998 17:39:06 EST
From: PEGLUMPKIN <PEGLUMPKINATnospamaol.com>
To: kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com
Subject: Re: sitting between two chairs
Message-ID: <2d599e3b.34f9e38cATnospamaol.com>
In a message dated 98-03-01 08:33:38 EST, you write:
<< Funny kundalini was not a topic Osho used to talk about, he talked
about allmost anything, even used the f-word.. >>
Is there more than one guru who used the name Osho? The only one I am
familiar with was the guru who formerly went by the name Bhagwan Shree
Rajneesh. When I read Jack Kornfield's book "A Path with Heart," the chapter
called "The Emperor's New Clothes, Problems with Teachers," I was reminded of
the experience our state had with Rajneeshpuram, Osho's community in Oregon.
It was one of those spiritual communities that armed itself literally with
guns, wire tapping equipment, a fleet of Rolls Royces, and lawyers. His main
spokesperson and personal secretary, Ma Anand Sheela, fled the country after
serving prison time for attempted murder and various other charges. Many
local people who were originally drawn to the spiritual community were not
comfortable with being pressured to only wear red, have free-for-all sex, and
turn over all their assets. They told stories of people being encouraged to
act out rape fantasies. When the bhagwan was deported after pleading guilty
to immigration fraud and tax evasion, the community dissolved.
And yet, if you read Osho's writing, his words very enlightened. Did he not
know what was occurring in his community? Did he let it all happen as a
practical lesson in the corruption of power? Luckily, none of the murder
attempts was successful. What would he have done had they been successful and
he had found out? Do the shenanigans of his lieutenants have any relevance to
or any effect on his teachings? Even though Osho has passed on, there are
still Osho communities around the world. I read that to gain admittance to
the Osho community in Poona, one must test negative for HIV and that testing
is administered at the entrance. It's hard for me to understand the intent.
And yet I know there are many people around the world who feel that Osho was
truly enlightened and a gifted spiritual leader. Maybe some day I can take
the wisdom of his words and not worry about why he had 96 Rolls Royces.
Peg
Date: Sun, 01 Mar 1998 17:19:46 +0000
From: Delirium <deliriumATnospamfull-moon.com>
To: kundalini-lATnospamlists.execpc.com
Subject: Drinking too much? Is this a side-effect of K for some?
Message-ID: <34F998AD.D3544A45ATnospamfull-moon.com>
Content-Type: text/plain; charset=us-ascii; x-mac-type="54455854"; x-mac-creator="4D4F5353"
I've started wondering if my K-awakening hasn't been sidetracked... bear
with me as I explain:
Since Princess Diana's death, and the subsequent symptoms of Kundalini
awakening, it seems I have been "drawn" toward alcohol as an
*anesthetic* perhaps...I'm not quite at the stage where I think it's a
real big problem (no absenteeism from work, no forgotten
responsibilities) ... but it's a very attractive and very real *escape
hatch* for me...I am not really an "addictive" type personality...can't
seem to keep up with anything "long enough" to be addicted...but the
"boozing" is beginning to worry me. (I'm sort of a chronic worrier, my
mama taught me that particular personality trait <grin>)
I could rationalize and say that this is a thing I need to experience
(which may indeed be true) in order to advance my consciousness...say,
by experiencing the effects of alcohol and what it can do to my
energies...but I feel there's something else going on here.
Any K-list members out there who have experienced similar "symptoms" or
have had similar experiences, your feedback on this is quite welcome...
Before things go too far...Brightest Blessings and hope you dear friends
have some answers!
Delirium (aptly nicknamed!)
Date: Sun, 01 Mar 1998 15:21:44 PST
From: "Cara McCormack" <caradeepaATnospamhotmail.com>
To: kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com
Subject: continuing...stuff....about..my sit.
Message-ID: <19980301232144.27423.qmailATnospamhotmail.com>
Content-Type: text/plain
Hi guys....thanks for all the interesting..and helpful info.....about
astrology..etc...
My mate in fact does have a huge amount of mars energy in his chart
to begin with...so i do believe that the mars transit did affect him in
a big way... However..i also see that whatever comes up...was there
already...and just gets really magnified....
Well the good news is....we are still together.....had a long
talk....about the stuff coming up for him...and he cleared up alot of my
misinterpretations.....He said he was never saying that he wanted to
break up....etc. Mostly trying to protect me.....and yea..that involves
taking space...when you are as intense as he can be....so...we talked
...and things are fine.....the relationship...i think is better in alot
of ways...and it is different...its going in a little different
direction than i had planned..but it is all great....
well just thought i would let you guys know...if you were
curious...... thanks so much...
cara
______________________
Get Your Private, Free Email at http://www.hotmail.com
Date: Sun, 01 Mar 1998 15:24:07 PST
From: "Cara McCormack" <caradeepaATnospamhotmail.com>
To: kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com
Subject: another quest..
Message-ID: <19980301232407.21273.qmailATnospamhotmail.com>
Content-Type: text/plain
Hi me again....
I was wondering if anyone has found a connection between
Candida...and kundalini...
i was just diagnosed with candida....
its wierd cuz so many of the candida symtoms are similar to signs of a
kundalini awakening....
Can both be happening.....?hummm...
let me know what u know.
cara
______________________
Get Your Private, Free Email at http://www.hotmail.com
Date: Sun, 01 Mar 1998 18:36:16 -0500
From: David Bozzi <david.bozziATnospamsnet.net>
To: Kundalini <kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com>
Subject: just ask
Message-ID: <34F9F0EF.A9002B46ATnospammail.snet.net>
Looking through the window
She appears.
Softly she says,
"The past didn't happen."
You're drowning in a whirlpool.
Of time.
Of nothing.
Shedding tears over misspent desire.
Your inheritance.
The world is but a dream
of misplaced want. Oh well,
Imagined hell.
This isn't what I want.
So I look to you with golden eyes.
Surprise.
I found you.
Let's create each other for eternity
Instead of dreams that cut
Like sharp knives and razor blades.
I'm here for you.
If you need me just ask...
Date: Mon, 2 Mar 1998 08:51:41 +0700
From: "Leonardi" <leonardiATnospamcentrin.net.id>
To: <kundalini-lATnospamlists.execpc.com>
Subject: unscribe
Message-Id: <199803020158.IAA31060ATnospamjupiter.centrin.net.id>
leonardiATnospamcentrin.net.id
Date: Sun, 01 Mar 1998 18:30:08 PST
From: "Roberto Gonzales del Valle" <rgvgATnospamhotmail.com>
To: kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com
Subject: Re: Drinking too much? Is this a side-effect of K for some?
Message-ID: <19980302023012.20273.qmailATnospamhotmail.com>
Content-Type: text/plain
Hello, D.
You wrote:
>
>I've started wondering if my K-awakening hasn't been sidetracked...
bear
>with me as I explain:
>
>Since Princess Diana's death, and the subsequent symptoms of Kundalini
>awakening, it seems I have been "drawn" toward alcohol as an
>*anesthetic* perhaps...I'm not quite at the stage where I think it's a
>real big problem (no absenteeism from work, no forgotten
>responsibilities) ... but it's a very attractive and very real *escape
>hatch* for me...I am not really an "addictive" type personality...can't
>seem to keep up with anything "long enough" to be addicted...but the
>"boozing" is beginning to worry me. (I'm sort of a chronic worrier, my
>mama taught me that particular personality trait <grin>)
>
>I could rationalize and say that this is a thing I need to experience
>(which may indeed be true) in order to advance my consciousness...say,
>by experiencing the effects of alcohol and what it can do to my
>energies...but I feel there's something else going on here.
>
>Any K-list members out there who have experienced similar "symptoms" or
>have had similar experiences, your feedback on this is quite welcome...
>
>Before things go too far...Brightest Blessings and hope you dear
friends
>have some answers!
>
>Delirium (aptly nicknamed!)
>
>
I´ve been going to a similar process fro years, my problem-drug were
anti anxiety pills. And even now I have my falls, which are and must
begin to stop and I want to thank here to many wonderful people on this
list for giving me such good advice which i still have in mind.
The thing is, depressant-annesthesic drugs only give you a temporary
escape to the tornado that we sometimes feel. But, in order to get to
the "eye of the tornado" we must stop those fixes because it`s like a
snow ball which gets larger and faster with each roll.
I started taking relaxing pills prescibed by a doctor in order to try
to stop a stuttering problem I had (I`m latin so is stuttering the right
word? Tartamudear in spanish). They gave me xanax back then when I was
13 years old. But I wasn´t hooked until I was 15 and discovered stronger
pills such as diazepan and Valium those were prescribed when my parebts
got divorced. I recently turned 22 and have stoped the stuttering but
have been on almost every drug you can get to avoid the "walls of the
tornado" as I came to call them while writing this post. Slowly gave up
all of them exept for the first one which i call my problem-drug: Pills,
legal ones.
So, my friend Delirium, I suggest either get off the storm, or choose
the eye of the tornado but remeber the snowball (I`m all methaphores
tonight)keeps on getting larger and the effort to stop it and melt must
be stronger with every drink or fix one takes.
Yes, sometimes I think each individual must go through everything in
this or in all our different lives. But that`s just a thought and deep
in our hearts and guts we all know the best - and ONLY- way to get there
is CLEAN. Beacause IT is the purest of the pure.
So, D, let`s breath! And drink lots of water!
My best wishes.
Roberto.
>
______________________
Get Your Private, Free Email at http://www.hotmail.com
Date: Sun, 01 Mar 1998 18:32:29 +0100
From: Gloria Greco <lodpressATnospamintercomm.com>
To: Bob Trevithick <rtrevATnospamredsuspenders.com>
CC: anandajyoti <anandajyotiATnospamgeocities.com>, HeartzenATnospamlistserv.servtech.com,
kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com
Subject: Re: HRTZEN: Powerful mis-connections for night training
Message-ID: <34F99BAC.4C2ATnospamintercomm.com>
Bob Trevithick wrote:
>
> On Sun, 01 Mar 1998 10:57:49 +0100, you wrote:
>
> >GG
> >Thank you I will watch my mouse and see if I'm doing something that I'm
> >not noticing. I appreciate the input because I know everyone doesn't
> >want to have all those words coming through. Is it possible somehow that
> >my program is corrupted or something also, or you just think it might be
> >something I'm doing and not realizing it. That sounds possible. Thanks
> >>
>
> Hi Gloria,
>
> I would suggest that since you've been successfully posting for a long
> time, it's unlikely that you've suddenly forgotten how to do it
> correctly. It's *possible* that you've developed a twitch in your
> mouse finger, but I wouldn't bet on it. :-)
>
> It could be that your mail program has become corrupted in some way.
> You might want to reinstall it and see if that helps.
>
> It could be that your ISP is having some kind of odd problem that is
> duplicating posts. Calling them and describing your problem might be
> useful.
>
> It could be that some other node along the route is having problems,
> and in that case there probably isn't much you can do except wait and
> hope they fix it.
>
> I haven't noticed any multiple postings from you, beyond the fact that
> you often cross-post to both the K list and the HeartZen list, and
> being on both lists I therefore get two copies. But that's normal
> behavior.
>
> Hope this helps...
GG
Yes, I suspect the same things, I'm waiting to see if Larry finds out if
our server is having problems. I am going to just go with it and see
what happens. thanks for your help though. GG
>
> Love,
> Bob
> --
> Bob Trevithick
> rtrevATnospamredsuspenders.com
--
Enter The Silence to Know God ... and... accept life as the teacher.
Gloria Joy Greco
e-mail me at : lodpressATnospamintercomm.com and visit our homepages at:
http://users.intercomm.com/larryn/
&
http://www.freeyellow.com/members/zg888/
Hope you enjoy them!
Date: Sun, 1 Mar 1998 20:18:55 -0800 (PST)
From: john light <ozgpATnospamyahoo.com>
To: Roberto Gonzales del Valle <rgvgATnospamhotmail.com>, kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com
Subject: Re: Drinking too much? Is this a side-effect of K for some?
Message-ID: <19980302041855.18165.rocketmailATnospamsend1c.yahoomail.com>
Content-Type: text/plain; charset=us-ascii
Dear Roberto:
Drinking too much can be a learned method of dealing with fear. It is
better to stand in your fear sober; watch it melt, and grow from your
experience.
regards,
JL
---Roberto Gonzales del Valle <rgvgATnospamhotmail.com> wrote:
>
>
> Hello, D.
> You wrote:
> >
> >I've started wondering if my K-awakening hasn't been sidetracked...
> bear
> >with me as I explain:
> >
> >Since Princess Diana's death, and the subsequent symptoms of
Kundalini
> >awakening, it seems I have been "drawn" toward alcohol as an
> >*anesthetic* perhaps...I'm not quite at the stage where I think
it's a
> >real big problem (no absenteeism from work, no forgotten
> >responsibilities) ... but it's a very attractive and very real
*escape
> >hatch* for me...I am not really an "addictive" type
personality...can't
> >seem to keep up with anything "long enough" to be addicted...but the
> >"boozing" is beginning to worry me. (I'm sort of a chronic worrier,
my
> >mama taught me that particular personality trait <grin>)
> >
> >I could rationalize and say that this is a thing I need to experience
> >(which may indeed be true) in order to advance my
consciousness...say,
> >by experiencing the effects of alcohol and what it can do to my
> >energies...but I feel there's something else going on here.
> >
> >Any K-list members out there who have experienced similar
"symptoms" or
> >have had similar experiences, your feedback on this is quite
welcome...
> >
> >Before things go too far...Brightest Blessings and hope you dear
> friends
> >have some answers!
> >
> >Delirium (aptly nicknamed!)
> >
> >
> I´ve been going to a similar process fro years, my problem-drug were
> anti anxiety pills. And even now I have my falls, which are and must
> begin to stop and I want to thank here to many wonderful people on
this
> list for giving me such good advice which i still have in mind.
>
> The thing is, depressant-annesthesic drugs only give you a
temporary
> escape to the tornado that we sometimes feel. But, in order to get to
> the "eye of the tornado" we must stop those fixes because it`s like a
> snow ball which gets larger and faster with each roll.
> I started taking relaxing pills prescibed by a doctor in order to
try
> to stop a stuttering problem I had (I`m latin so is stuttering the
right
> word? Tartamudear in spanish). They gave me xanax back then when I
was
> 13 years old. But I wasn´t hooked until I was 15 and discovered
stronger
> pills such as diazepan and Valium those were prescribed when my
parebts
> got divorced. I recently turned 22 and have stoped the stuttering but
> have been on almost every drug you can get to avoid the "walls of the
> tornado" as I came to call them while writing this post. Slowly gave
up
> all of them exept for the first one which i call my problem-drug:
Pills,
> legal ones.
> So, my friend Delirium, I suggest either get off the storm, or
choose
> the eye of the tornado but remeber the snowball (I`m all methaphores
> tonight)keeps on getting larger and the effort to stop it and melt
must
> be stronger with every drink or fix one takes.
> Yes, sometimes I think each individual must go through everything
in
> this or in all our different lives. But that`s just a thought and
deep
> in our hearts and guts we all know the best - and ONLY- way to get
there
> is CLEAN. Beacause IT is the purest of the pure.
> So, D, let`s breath! And drink lots of water!
>
> My best wishes.
>
> Roberto.
> >
>
>
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>
>
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