1997/05/09 07:45
kundalini-l-d Digest V97 #218
kundalini-l-d Digest Volume 97 : Issue 218
Today's Topics:
Kundalini Kindergarten
great book i just read
Enlightenment?
Conversations with God
Re: on enlightenment - some brief definitions from the east
Fw: Prozac and K
Rain Man
Re: Manic-depression
Re: Prozac and K
Date: Fri, 9 May 1997 04:02:21 -0400 (EDT)
From: PEGLUMPKINATnospamaol.com
To: kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com
Subject: Kundalini Kindergarten
Message-ID: <970509040220_908495036ATnospamemout07.mail.aol.com>
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Greetings, Everyone
This is my debut posting, as I´m new on the list and very new to kundalini.
In fact, I had never heard of kundalini until a week after I got my first
big zap on 3/20/97. Although I´m a 49 year old woman of the American
suburbs, I hope someone here will see me as an eager kindergarten student,
standing timidly at the class room door. Is there a room monitor to take my
hand and show me to my seat? I´ve been gulping down kundalini books like a
thirsty child, but they have provided more questions than answers since I´m
not familiar with the unique terminology. I´ve never meditated or done yoga.
I thought a chakra was something you served with curry. The only Yogi I´m
familiar with had a sidekick named Boo Boo. Is there someone who doesn't
mind being dragged down from loftier thoughts to my "nuts and bolts" level?
I´m truly a stranger in a strange land.
Assuming that two of the functions of this list are to discuss questions and
share experiences, I would first like to pose several questions in hopes that
someone would like to discuss them further. Then, in case anyone is
gathering data about spontaneous kundalini activation, I´ll tell of my own
experience and would love to hear from anyone who has taken a similar ride.
First question. In my initial episode, the vibrations seemed to be at a
slower frequency and more violent than subsequent occurrences, which were
much faster and more delicate vibrations. At first, it was like trying to
start a car in third gear, but now it´s more like being invaded by thousands
of tiny bees. Is this progression from slower to faster vibrations something
you all had in common in the beginning?
Second question. When the visual imagery manifests (I call it the "light
shows"), are there referents for the symbols? In other words, is there a
lexicon of the lights? Do we look for the meaning or just sit back and enjoy
the show?
Third question. Is there a kundalini "honeymoon" period? Is eventual
suffering part of the package? I´ve read accounts of painful and tormented
kundalini bouts. But, with the exception of a recurring headache the size of
a small egg in the front of my forehead, these past seven weeks have been
almost euphoric. They have reminded me of the first months of pregnancy when
I would go around smiling all day, knowing I had a secret new companion with
me. Of course, with kundalini, the big difference is that I have no idea
what I´m giving birth to. Am I necessarily headed for a big fall?
Fourth question. I´ve noticed that the vibrations intensify during
spiritually oriented conversations or thoughts. When the kundalini energy
washes over the body, is this a marker that you´re on-task? (Sometimes I
feel like Pavlov´s dog, getting a reward for the desired behavior.)
Fifth question. If the kundalini activates in an untrained person, is it
advisable to undertake a new discipline? Unless you want to count
spacing-out on the freeway as a form of meditation, I don´t meditate, do
yoga, or in anyway harness my rowdy brain. Does everyone else practice
Eastern disciplines? Is growth limited without them? Is the idea to tame
the kundalini or to let it have its way with you?
Last question for now. Has the kundalini crowd ever exchanged thoughts or
insights about the interpretation by J.M. Pryse that the Apocalypse of the
Book of Revelation is an oblique reference to kundalini rising through the
"beasts" or chakras? I came across an excerpt in John White´s Kundalini,
Evolution, and Enlightenment, and it helped assuage my own feelings that
human life on Earth would in fact be coming to an end very shortly. The same
John White, in his book Pole Shift, concluded that the "horrific visions of
world destruction… seem to be reflections of the collective psyche of our
time, which is generating its own images of planetary death and regeneration
for which the sensitive souls of our era serve as carriers." Is anyone else
grasping at this idea for comfort?
Okay, here´s my story now. Last December, I thought I had found a big piece
in the nature-of-reality puzzle, and I was of the mindset that there were
objective, rational, clinical explanations for all the paranormal experiences
people have recounted throughout man´s history. I thought I understood the
"How," if not the "Why." Then, whammo, the strangest parade of coincidences
began happening. At some point, these coincidences were so persistent and so
uncanny that I, even as the inveterate skeptic, had to admit that my naïve
cosmic paradigm could not accommodate the impossible phenomena I was
experiencing. Somewhere in the midst of the synchronicity, my brain got
retrofitted with a different set of filters. The coincidences led me to many
subjects I knew little or nothing about: pyramids, numerology, ley lines,
pendulums, astrology, auras, angels, channeling, reincarnation, the Kabbalah,
the I Ching, the Tarot, Freemasonry, brotherhoods, Theosophy, pole shift, and
many more. Now everything seemed possible, and the folks in the psychic
community didn´t look so deluded to me anymore. Part of the package,
however, was accepting that my own visions of world destruction were valid.
But I was cool with it. My only concern was trying to figure out how to
help others not be afraid of it. What was my mission? How could I best be
of service? Enter kundalini with a real show-stopper. Now I am seeing that
pesky end-of-the-world scenario as more symbolic of transformation. I feel
bewildered, yet confident; awestruck, yet fearless; blessed, yet obligated;
protected, yet challenged; and all around jubilant.
Anyone interested can stay on board now, and I´ll take you through my wild
ride. For anyone not interested in the details, thanks for listening to this
point.
My first experience of kundalini was at 1:00AM while I was quietly lying in
bed, waiting for sleep. With my eyes closed, I saw something like a streak
that came with a sudden snapping effect, as though someone had lit a match in
the dark. Then I saw a bright white light, through which came a brilliant
cobalt blue spot of light. Then from a behind me came a violent, but not
painful, vibration that was so intense that I was not certain I would live
through it. I could not feel my body. I felt like nothing but an egg-shaped
vibration, which ebbed briefly and then returned to the original intensity.
When it left, my heartbeat was slightly elevated, but I was otherwise
normal. The coincidences continued.
Several days later, the vibrations came at night again, somewhat gentler, in
a sequence of waves that were actually quite pleasant. Just two days later,
the vibrations were activated in a hypnosis session. Luckily, the
hypnotherapist had been through the process herself and recognized
immediately what was happening to me. She guided me until the sensations
calmed, then explained a little about kundalini and directed me to a book
shop.
One unusual episode began with my hearing that old song "Crystal Blue
Persuasion." I must have been dreaming that part when the vibrations
awakened me at 1:30 in the morning. The vibrations were so intense that I
actually thought it was an earthquake. Then I heard a thunder-like roar that
was pierced by an intermittent electrical snapping sound. I had the
sensation that my left leg made a circular motion from the knee, but this
couldn´t have happened because the bedding was too tight. In another
episode, I had the sensation after the vibrations had started that the bottom
half of my torso had disappeared and was replaced by slow pulsing waves that
emanated out in concentric circles.
Three other episodes were accompanied by magnificent images that had the
quality of open-eyed sight. The first began with a rectangular field filled
with crystalline shapes, maybe like a snowflake, or a dendrite structure, or
a fractal pattern. Then I saw that there were layers of fields within this
field, distinguished as negatives of each other, and I moved my focus in and
out of the levels. Some were a light field with a dark pattern, and some
were a dark field with a light pattern. Then a smaller eye shape appeared
that was so balanced that I could not tell which was field and which was
pattern. At the end of the vision, I saw the face of Albert Einstein, then
nothing else. The next episode was in the morning when I noticed I had
awakened with my ankles crossed and my hands clasped over my heart. The
vibrations were very comfortable, and then it was like my upper torso
disappeared into slow pulsing waves, again moving out in concentric rings.
Then came the most exquisite sight I have ever seen. With my eyes closed,
my vision was filled with hundreds of small white spots of light.
Eventually, the lights began moving in independent arc patterns, creating
the impression of solid lines which were each a band with all the colors of
the spectrum. The movement of the lines increased so that each spot created
the illusion of leaf-like, organic designs. The patterns became more
intricate until they blended into one unified field of individual spots,
which then blended into one solid, golden light field. The last "light show"
I had was a spinning circular lattice that looked like two vortexes of lines
in opposite directions superimposed over each other. The nature of these
visions was quite different than the way I "see" a dream or a memory.
The vibrations are pretty much with me all day now at some level, especially
in my hands and legs. When it is quiet, I hear a tone in my head that I have
identified as an F natural on the piano. The moods of people around me seem
to be more obvious than they were before. At the moment, I prefer not to be
around people any more than necessary. Most of my dreams now seem rife with
meaning. I find music, movies, poetry, and novels way too emotional for me
to deal with right now. Small noises make me jump, and flowers bring me to
tears. I have never felt any sensations in particular going up my spine. I
have never had the sensations of heat or sweating that I have read about.
Quite the opposite, my sensations are more like goose bumps. Just typing
this email has intensified them. So now I´ll close, toss this message into a
bottle, and cast it into the electronic ocean.
Thank you to all who have plodded their way through my ramblings,
Peggy Lumpkin
Date: Fri, 9 May 1997 04:17:23 -0400 (EDT)
From: CDeepaATnospamaol.com
To: kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com
Subject: great book i just read
Message-ID: <970508205036_-699479237ATnospamemout06.mail.aol.com>
Hi this is the first time i have written on here....I have been having
kundalini experience for 12 years now....not really knowing it was spiritual
until last year....been thru all the crap...and stuff.....anyhow.....i just
picked up this book that is incredible....a little bit more abstract...and
very fitting to my situation...and experience....when all this started to
happen ...i was only 16 ...and had no clue...and the terror was with
me....for a long time...its still there...i don't take it as seriously now
since i know what is happening to me is " good".....anyhow....the book is
called......COLLISION WITH THE INFINITE....by Suzanne Segal......
I hope it can help someone.....it has helped me so much....to see
that the empty....feeling is truth.....not sure if you guys understand ..but
i wanted to throw it out
there.....................................Deepa............
Date: Fri, 9 May 1997 07:14:54 +0100
From: vic bonds <wildwingsATnospampeconic.net>
To: kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com
Subject: Enlightenment?
Message-Id: <11145491403293ATnospampeconic.net>
Hi, so very very full of light, you are,
my sweetheart agrees with you, so far,
in fairyland there's hell to pay saying
things like that can land you in the brink
of eternity, and soulful of loving energy
you see, we love you so much, already,
yes, today, there is a steady, beat to our feet
dancing along to in the streets of Love and Spirit.
Back to you, my love, what'll we do today,
or, are we going to play magical chairs and
pretend we are just the same old ghosts or
do we change, change, change, in love?
>We are already enlightened!
>
>Most of us, most of the time just don't know it.
>
>Enlightenment is remembering who we are as extensions
>
>of the one universal self.
>
>We can't really change what we are created as.
>
>Though it seems we like to think we can.
>
>So meanwhile, while we forget who we are, our
>
>real-self still remains intact and fully enlightened
>
>beyond the grasp of time!
>
>Mystics and prophets who get the label of being enlightened
>
>are just really very good at remembering and experiencing
>
>their true holy
>
>identity consistently.
>
>>From moment to moment.
>
>
>Intend to remember!
>
>
>Peace.
>
>David.
>
>
Date: Fri, 9 May 1997 07:38:06 -0400 (EDT)
From: SeraphinsATnospamaol.com
To: Kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com
Subject: Conversations with God
Message-ID: <970509073804_87304505ATnospamemout10.mail.aol.com>
For those of you in the Chicago area, the author of this book will again be
on the Thomas Pecora show sometime this month. I can't access his website
right now to get you the date, but if you're interested, check it out ATnospam
www.thomaspecora.com. It's under construction but he does have a link to his
calendar. His show airs from 7-10 p.m. CST Mondays on 92.7FM (WCBR).
His guests are on from 8-9 and are usually very good.
Date: Fri, 9 May 1997 13:34:28 +0200
From: "H. Mensing" <hanmeyATnospampi.net>
To: "anita grayson" <eiregrayATnospamhotmail.com>,
"Tom Aston" <yogi.tomATnospamtantrictom.demon.co.uk>
Cc: <kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com>
Subject: Re: on enlightenment - some brief definitions from the east
Message-Id: <199705091144.NAA15962ATnospammailhost.pi.net>
----------
> Van: Tom Aston <yogi.tomATnospamtantrictom.demon.co.uk>
> Aan: anita grayson <eiregrayATnospamhotmail.com>
> CC: kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com
> Onderwerp: on enlightenment - some brief definitions from the east
> Datum: donderdag 8 mei 1997 19:54
>
>Hi all!
As to Tom's question concerning other descriptions of enlightenment, I'd
like to point to the books by Adi Da (I'm His Dutch translator) e.g. `The
Knee of Listening' , `The Heart's Shout' and `Easy Death' . In a talk on
`Crazy Wisdom' Adi Da said: "The popular view is that when a being becomes
Enlightened, suddenly he or she sees how the universe arises, sees what
everything is about, sees the hierarchy or structures of the cosmos and can
map it all out. All kinds of people have such experiences long before they
even approximate the capability for Divine Self-Realization. Such
capabilities are just possibilities, appearances. You must Realize their
Source, their Nature, their Condition, their Identity."
Love, Hanny
Date: Fri, 9 May 1997 06:01:09 -0500
From: "Spiral" <spiral-3ATnospamworldnet.att.net>
To: "Kundalini Mailing List" <kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com>
Subject: Fw: Prozac and K
Message-ID: <19970509110124.AAA7416ATnospamrjiredff>
Hi All,
----------
> Larry Killen wrote:
>
> >
> > Does anyone have any information/thoughts on Prozac and K?
> >
>
> Hi Larry,
>
> I'm not sure what you're asking about, and I know this may be a
> controversial topic. I don't have any experience with people who have
had
> kundalini risings and who also have taken Prozac. I am not a
> psychopharmacology expert. I do work as one of those "mental health
> professionals" who are often maligned on this list :) . Prozac, as you
> probably know, is considered a serotonin reuptake inhibitor, but there
are
> still questions about how it really works. It is generally believed to
> act by altering the brain chemistry in such a way as to make more
serotonin
> available in the brain's centers which have to do with mood regulation.
> And, as you probably also know, it is very popular these days. It is
used
> primarily for problems with depression, but also for certain anxiety and
> eating disorders.
>
> My general take on this is as follows: The "symptom" is often the way
out.
> Depression occurs for a reason. Something in our approach to life is not
> working, we get "stuck" in some way, something in our consciousness is
out
> of balance, we suffer a major loss. What we call depression is a
movement
> of psychic energy downward and inward for the purpose of restoration and
> healing. The energy goes down to draw upon our innate healing potential
> for renewal - if we respect the process for what it is and allow it to
> happen! Prozac, I believe, tends to circumvent this natural attempt by
the
> system to heal itself. One may start to feel better, but the needed
changes
> in perspective and consciousness may not have occurred. Now, there are
> some exceptions. It is not for me to say that some forms of depression
are
> not purely biochemical in nature. I have seen instances where this very
> well may have been the case.
>
> So, if depression is an opportunity for growth, why mess around with our
> brain chemistry? Well, it can be hellish. It can be so prolonged and
> debilitating that one can become unable to function in the world, to do
the
> work necessary to find the meaning of the symptom, etc. Many people with
K
> risings have bouts of depression, anxiety, despair. I know I have. At
the
> practical level, it often comes down to how much a person can endure, and
> what the clinical level of the depression is. Unfortunately, the
> popularity of Prozac often leads people who have very mild depressive
> conditions to come to me asking for pills. They have no interest or
> inclination in doing any kind of work which involves introspection or
> self-examination.
>
> As far as what effect Prozac may have on the Kundalini cleansing process,
> I have no idea.
>
> In my practice I recommend a psychiatric evaluation for psychotropic meds
> only as a last resort, and even then to be used as an adjunct to
> psychotherapy, not a replacement. I hope this is of some help to you.
>
> Love, Spiral
Date: Fri, 9 May 1997 08:31:30 -0500
From: "Spiral" <spiral-3ATnospamworldnet.att.net>
To: "Kundalini Mailing List" <kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com>
Subject: Rain Man
Message-ID: <19970509133212.AAA22041ATnospamrjiredff>
Hi All,
Two nights ago I dreamt I was Dustin Hoffman. Weary, lying prone with
arms outstretched, I embraced the earth beneath me. Beam
after beam of white light penetrated up my spine into my head. I was in
awe of its relentlessness.
As "splinter intelligences" manifest themselves - small spontaneous feats
of altered consciousness - I feel damaged, alienated, blessed. My brain
no longer functions normally, but I could win academy awards for outward
portrayals of normalcy. I get tired.
I cling to the Motherhood of God, the Earth, to support and guide me
through this.
Mystress Angelique once wrote to the effect that living with kundalini is
like living with an unrecognized disability. I liked that.
Love, Spiral
Feeling just a little autistic
Date: Fri, 09 May 1997 07:04:11 -0700
From: Ken McFarland <kenmATnospamOREGON.UOREGON.EDU>
To: morganaATnospambest.com
Cc: Kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com
Subject: Re: Manic-depression
Message-id: <1.5.4.32.19970509140411.00685f5cATnospamoregon.uoregon.edu>
At 12:12 AM 5/9/97 -0700, Morgana Wyze wrote:
>What is gingko bilova, might that help?
>Morgana
There are lots of Web sites such as:
www.indirect.com/www/tombro/biloba.html
Gingko bilova is supposed to increase blood circulation in the brain and
other parts of the body.
It does seem to do that.
I checked the scientic literature and there have been a number of studies
that showed significant effects in memory improvement for Alzheimer's
patients. So it really does do something good.
I've found nothing indicating any harmful side effects.
I've been using gingko bilova about 2 months.
I seem to be more alert.
I think gingko bilova might help a little on the depressive side.
Sincerely,
Ken
Date: Fri, 9 May 1997 10:37:48 -0400
From: "Larry Killen" <mosiahATnospammindspring.com>
To: "Larry Killen" <mosiahATnospammindspring.com>,
"Kundalini List" <kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com>
Subject: Re: Prozac and K
Message-Id: <199705091439.KAA04215ATnospambrickbat8.mindspring.com>
Okay, I'll come clean and state the full nature of my question. And thanks
for all the inputs.
I have periodically gone on Prozac. It seems to be a seasonal depression
related to the fall season. I truly think it has something to do with the
start of the school year and my dreadful memories of summer ending. (I
felt like a prisoner in school). When spring comes I stop.
A little enlightenment. Prozac doesn't actually mask anything.
(depressives do that). It actually increases the amount of serotonin
available to the brain. I don't feel as if my problems have gone away. I
just don't feel so overwhelmed be the associated feelings.
I was able to become more spiritual as a result of Prozac. I was able to
meditate and pray. I was told when I first started taking it that I would
know I was ready to stop by the fact that when I did so and did not detect
a difference. The point... I was able to correct whatever issues on
Prozac so that when I ceased it's use, they were no longer there. (Like a
cast on a bone break)
Part of my history is alcohol addiction. Read Bill Wilson's story if you
want to witness a kundalini awakening. I secretly believe most of us in AA
are K crazed and were attempting to suppress it with booze/drugs. Even the
lingo supports this. i.e.. spirits, getting high, a buzz, etc. etc.
I used Prozac to assist my recovery from alcohol. I used 20 mg / day. (an
exceptionally small amount)
I was able to delve deeply into a spiritual way of life and heal inside.
On Prozac I did not loose sight of my issues but I was able to see them
without the strong defenses and therefore work with them.
My only side affects seemed to be strange sleep habits, very weird dreams,
initially a dry mouth. I did not like the fact that I was chained to a
little pill so I would stop now and then. At first, when I stopped, the
symptoms re-appeared. So I went back on Prozac for a few months. Later I
stopped again and the change was un-detectable. I think Prozac was a
transitional element for me.
I do not recommend the use of any chemicals for anyone lightly. And I am
very suspicious of long term use. Prozac is a very well targeted
substance. (I am purposely skirting the term drug here) But if anyone uses
it I highly recommend it to be used with other modalities such as talk
therapy, meditation, prayer, spiritual reading, belonging to a list like
this.
We live in a society that does not well facilitate anyone moving ahead
spiritually. Thems still some empty crosses out there! I have suffered
the effects of K since I was a child but did not have the where-with-all,
or support that I needed. I paid dearly. (I was simply considered weird)
I was given nick names such as reverend, spook, psycho, dreamer and the
like. It left some scares that later needed massaging. I wanted to escape
those labels so turned the other direction as hard as I could. I joined
the Marine Corps.! Guess what they thought about 'K'?
But my path is probably no more bizarre than more of yours and probably
every step was necessary to get where I am at this moment (struggling
through grad school!). I truly have no complaints.
I did find that Prozac seemed to enhance the K effects some. But it is
very hard to meter. Every thing out of the ordinary, whether self induced,
or external seems to enhance K. A life trauma, (family death), high work
stress, deep prayer, long meditations, a good play, etc. I was giving a
steroid type shot for a sinus infection. That night was wildly exciting.
I went through all Grof's BPM plus some. I guess that little additional
energy kicked me into hyper K.
I used to become very psychic during bad hang-overs. A hang-over will
annihilate the ego for a period of time and leave a lot of room for other
sources of information. Surely some of you have sat on the side of your
beds the morning after with your mind in total cessation! But it is a high
price to pay for a spiritual experience.
I am babbling and have to get back to work. Thank you all for you replies.
This is a very loving group of people which is I think the secret to it
ALL.
----------
> From: Larry Killen <mosiahATnospammindspring.com>
> To: Kundalini List <kundalini-lATnospamexecpc.com>
> Subject: Prozac and K
> Date: Wednesday, May 07, 1997 9:47 PM
>
>
> Does anyone have any information/thoughts on Prozac and K?
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