To: K-list
Recieved: 2002/06/24 12:01
Subject: Re: [K-list] Digest Number 1052
From: Mystress Angelique Serpent

    Heya:

I still go through some kind of big growing phase every August and
January. August tends to be intense and blissful, so much energy I have to
be very mindful how I aim it... January tends to be intense and
scary... Last August was relatively quiet, as I had requested but then
came 9/11... August used to be an annual time of emotional trauma.

   I noticed it before I used the paradigm of K. to frame my experiences. I
noticed around 1993 that I had had a long run of bad Augusts, like August
88. Unemployed in a new town. I discovered I was pregnant by the abusive
boyfriend I had left behind and I had not been in the province long enough
to have health care or get a student loan to attend university as I had
intended. Ashes, ashes, it all falls down. Nowadays, August is usually kind
of fun but I still have to be careful with attachments. I believe
eventually Jan. will be too.

    Last January... Very intense. I knew I would get though it because I've
been there, done that but the process was so uncomfortable I still ended up
yelling for help to healer friends and professionals. .. and getting it,
and many other gifts besides.

    I have sometimes wondered if these events are responding to the
anniversary of some old uncleared trauma, but the gifts I get from it tends
to make me think it is more likely related to my body responding to the
seasons of the northern hemisphere.

    I find the Wiccan wheel of the year, and the 8 Sabbats to be faily
accurate in how Celtic folks respond to the changing seasons. I find
celebrating the Sabbats to be a nice form of "active surrender", accepting
that the body is part of the Earth and its seasons. Sine wave of the
Serpent, K. has its ups and downs.

Happy Solstice!! :)
 Blessings...

At 10:42 AM 22/06/02, shellelrATnospamaol.com wrote:
> > This is another one of those really tough times for me that I go
> > through every month or so where I think I cant deal with life. If
> > you ask me I wouldnt take my K awakening back for anything but why do
> > I have such periods of fear makes little since but then what does?
> >
> > We all go through these cycles. It is part of the process. Eventually
> > fear gets less and less and peace and calmness are more ever present
> > in your life. It can be a B*tch in the beginnig but there is an end
> > to it. I promise. :)
>

>Kristena, I went through several fear cycles last spring and summer and often
>felt like I might not be able to survive them, I was so miserable. But I'm
>much better now! I really dealt with a lot of old deep stuff, death too.
>I'm still in the process of dealing with fears and worries, but it has gotten
>much easier. Hang in there! You are growing!
>
>Shelle

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