To: K-list
Recieved: 2001/09/28 09:52
Subject: Re: [K-list] More Experiences, this one is it...
From: José H
On 2001/09/28 09:52, José H posted thus to the K-list:
Hi Sean,
You are and you are here on this earth!
Isn't it wonderful.
José
>
> Hello all,
> This is the one. I've been going nuts lately. I asked an intuit that
> I knew was connected up right who I was. What I was. He said,
> "Ok, this is comming from a higher source, this might shock you...
> Why dont you trust? We have given you a gift and you do not trust it"
>
> WHAT!!??
>
> Isn't that what I've been doing? I talked to him a bit more and he
> tried to interpret it. Wrong... No no no... Anyways, he said trust.
> Let go of my searching for who I am.
>
> HUH!!!??
>
> Isnt this the quest we are all on. To find out who we are? The basic
> need? And I'm not supposed to know what, or who I am?
>
> WHATS THE DAMN POINT!!!???
>
> Round and round I go my thoughts spinning like crazy.. what do I do?
> what do I do? How can I be me without being me? How can I live and
> relate without knowing who I am...
> Time passes... more time... I feel horrable.... Im grinding my mind..
>
> Then I listen to my heart's reaction. And start talking.
>
> "I am an empath"
>
> I feel it.. but its not right..Its small and closed off...
>
> "I am an indigo"
>
> I feel that to, its more open and better but its still closed off...
>
> "I am sean"
>
> Almost.....
>
> "I AM"
>
> I feel myself open, I am in a limitless sky. My spirit floating
> there. Up, down, everywhere. Nice clouds, light blue sky. Its
> amaizing. I understand. By even trying to name myself I am putting a
> limitation on what I can become. Control on the thought level.
> Empath..small light, pinpoint, nothing. Indigo..bigger light, but in
> a vast dark. I AM...vast unlimited sky.
>
> I am.
>
> I trust
>
> I am
>
> I trust
>
> I repeat this
>
> Thats it. Nothing is impossible I feel. I feel good. I hang out for a
> long time.. I am so open, my heart likes this too. Cool... I try to
> connect to Goddess... I feel something in my heart.. Its not right.
> thats old thinking. Patterns for my concious mind.
>
> I remember the scene from Star Wars.. "Let go Luke... Use the
> force.."
> I let go. I connect without thought.... I am connected. I am
> connected and more open to the connection than ever before. This is
> the right way for me. There is no object, its here, I am a part of
> it. I dont care to understand it. It is. Whoa... I cant explain it..
> uhh transendence?
>
> I ask for something. I start the words.. Its done.. but.. its done...
>
> I go to send up something. I pick it out.. Start the words.. It
> disapears. Hey! wha...? Uhh... thanks....
>
> Everything is happening so fast... I take a break, and view the sky.
>
> I wonder about things..people. I move.. I see a block of a platform
> below me, there are a lot of people on it. There are walls and doors
> and they are all running around on it going different places. I try
> to add the rest of the building and some nice architecture.. It
> starts to fade...dont control, let go... I do it again.. let it go..
> I finnaly get it. I let it show me. Its like a singel level of an
> office building. Now I am on a lift that goes from there level and
> slowly rises. I ask,
>
> "What do they want?"
>
> "Everything"
>
> "Oh"
>
> I asked why dont they just see all of this..
>
> They cant.
>
> I watch them for a bit understanding more about them.. Then I
> realise that all this time I am repeating over and over again..
>
> I am
>
> I trust
>
> I am
>
> I trust
>
> I move again, up and away from the platform, through cloud layers. I
> go up. I see a soft sun blended with the blue sky. I am so open with
> the sky. I get the feeling of first, or first time here. I Feel lots
> of love.. Cool, I accept it all. I start talking. More like feeling.
> Something about sending lots of stuff up and its ok. More talk about
> other things I cant remember... I think I said that I liked this
> place, I cant remember to much now.. I just remember limitless sky, I
> am part of the sky. The sun that I am a part of and can sense and
> connect to is in the sky and its all part of the same thing and its
> like my heart is saying, "This is the right place" I feel it open, I
> am flying without moving.
>
> I stay for a bit but I am losing my thoughts, I'm trying to control.
> things. I am I trust.. stabilise.. Ok... what is this? who is this?
> Losing it.. stop it.. I am I trust... I am falling out of the sky,
> there goes the sun. My brain is at the limit.. I have to leave.
>
> I am back in the sky. limitless. Open. I can go anywhere, but here
> is good.
>
> I am, I trust.
>
> I now see a horrable boars severed head bouncing around in the sky.
> Its horrable. I'm about to run. But then I think of the knowledge
> I've gained here...
>
> "What are you?" I ask.
> "I'm afraid, Im fear, I dont know what this is. I'm terrified...",
> it said with a trembling voice.
> "Ok," I say "I'll send you away........no wait..."
> I reach out and take the head in my hands. Its bad. I smile and tell
> it,
> "You dont have to be afraid, I know what this is, its all good. I
> know it, dont worry", and with that I bring it close and I see it
> changing, I calmly give it a kiss right between the eyes sending it
> love, its changing faster now.. It turns to a crystal object thats
> morphing into something else... I raise it up above me quickly there
> is a light and..
>
> BOOM!
>
> It explodes, shattering crystal. It explodes into the most beautiful
> buterflies I have ever seen. There color patterns so intricate and
> varied. There must be hundereds of them, all dancing about and
> fluttering this way and that, flying all around me in the sky. I
> stare in absolute amaizment. A beautiful new understanding.
>
> "Wow.."
> I get up, I feel different. I am missing/gaining something in me.
> Its good.
>
> "Wow..."
>
> I have to post this on the K-list...
>
> I run over to my computer.. fire it up....
> Hello all,
> This is the one. I've been going nuts lately........
>
> Sean
>
> I am
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