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To: K-list
Recieved: 2001/08/26 17:44
Subject: Re: [K-list] Re: Concepts of God(dess)
From: Mystress Angelique Serpent


On 2001/08/26 17:44, Mystress Angelique Serpent posted thus to the K-list:

At 06:25 AM 8/26/01, Panthur212ATnospamhotmail.com wrote:
>"...Don't you think that He would have made it perfect??? Don't you
>beleive that God has the power to give the humans who wrote it Grace
>enough to serve as perfect and uninterrupted channels?"

    :) It is perfect, and so is everything else. Perfect in its human
fallibility. Every human, every tree and rock is a perfect and
uninterrupted channel, only most do not see themselves or others as that.

>*Shrug*.. :0) I've recently slipped into a place, though I've
>kicked and fought with it a while, where no God existed- - it was
>simply There. It didn't have a personailty, or a Being, because *I*
>was a facet of that personality.. I WAS that being... or of it- -???
>
>The Air was Air. It was Divine... It was beauty - -.... I was ME.
>I was Beauty- -

    It is called Self Realization, Jason. :) :) :) You caught the brass
ring, this is what you were seeking, though you did not know it.

>But this Terrified me. It still makes me uneasy.... and yet??

    Ego is scared, of course.. these insights mean its death.. so that the
real You can live free.

>My beliefs are slowly dissolving- -and my clutching fingers are
>starting to loosen...

    Know nothing, be everything.

    God-dess is bigger than all of our conceptualizations and
understandings... and yet, God-dess is All that Is, those too. The dogma
and beliefs, are simply to point the way, and in the end, must be
surrendered along with everything else.

>I had No one to ask for Guidance. I was completely alone... I
>couldn't ask for help, or healing, or synchronous miracles anymore
>because there was no "GOD" to ask....

    Yes. When you are still in duality, there must be God/Goddess to have
something to surrender the separation to.. you are separate and seek
something to merge with.. and when you have merged.. they is only the
Self... and it is All.

>I'm typing in a state of- - calm... Utter calm right now.
>Like, "whatever comes out of this will be perfect"....

    Yes.. will be, and always has been, except for the ego judgments that
said it was not.

> I don't
>understand- - I don't know what Im Supposed to understand or not... I
>don't understand a damned thing right now- -:0)
>
>but I'm trying to let go so that I might....

    When I first read Joe's words about understanding God, my thought was,
that he would truly understand God when he realized that God cannot ever be
understood with the part of the mind that seeks understanding. Yet.. set
that reasoning mind aside, and we can BE that.. without any need of
understanding.
    With this later post, it comes clearer.. he is not attaining
understanding, so much as surrendering limiting beliefs to make room for
transcendence.

>I look to the sky and ask: Where is my Goddess???? It's rather
>frightening. Part of me Needs that Personal Interaction with the
>Divine that is there to help and give me love, directly- - whatnot - -
>
>But i KNOW in my heart that this is an illusion.. So who the hells am
>I asking???

   ROTFLOL!! When you had ego separation and Goddess seemed to be separate
from Jason.. it worked. And now.. Jason is Goddess. So is everything else.
Goddess is everywhere and nowhere. I am That... and so are you.

>I am asking this formless, awesome, infathomable State of Being, for
>help- -and offering it an illusion to jump into with which to guide
>me.

   Hilarious, eh? Laughter is the nature of spirit..

>It scares me. I don't udnerstand - -I don't want to, and at the same
>time, I've Got to.

   Nope, ya don't got to, and ya never will. Surrender the idea that you
need to understand.

>I know I can let go of the need to comprehend-

    :)

> -but I"m curious. I
>want to know where I go from here... but I can't Ask Goddess for
>Guidance, because my "Goddess" concept is not in existance unless I
>force it- -and I can't Force GOddess. That's just stupid. ;0)

    You are done, and you are free. Follow your heart, follow your bliss.
Thou art God, and you can create anything your heart desires. Or.. you can
create nothing, have no desires or attachments, and life will carry you
along in its perfect flow.

>Right now I"m wondering how on earth i can trust myself. I used to
>think that Goddess was guiding me and protecting me and soothing- -it
>was bliss. Vibrant, ecstatic bliss, the times when I Knew that....
>
>now?? It's a different bliss- -but it's almost like teh Spirituality
>of it is gone, or drained. You know?? Like before it was Fire, and
>now it's- -
>
>. . . . . . *listens to the wind move between trees, and smiles,
>softly... thanking something that he doesn't come close to
>understanding... thanking something which his heart knows...*

    Yes. The fire burned away the separation, and now It's.... everything.
So lovely, so wondrous and awesome, and so simple... so perfectly,
exquisitely simple.

>That's it exactly.
>
>Where from here?" I ask myself.... MySelf is silent, because I am
>Deaf with no Goddess to guide me........
>
>and yet.. . .?? something shimmers. quietly.

Something..:)

 Have I told you lately, that your beauty is.. so ...
 no words..
 I love you.


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