To: K-list
Recieved: 2001/06/26 08:00
Subject: Re: [K-list] My Journey into the Cosmic Fire
From: missy chicken
On 2001/06/26 08:00, missy chicken posted thus to the K-list:
somtimes it feels like you and cw are watching me waiting to see what im
going to do next *smiles* actually it feels a bit like the whole world is
waiting at times.. LOL
or i could just be getting paraniod again....
ms chicky
>From: Fiona Tulk <lifestreamsATnospambigpond.com>
>To: K-list
>Subject: [K-list] My Journey into the Cosmic Fire
>Date: Wed, 27 Jun 2001 00:33:20 +1000
>
>For 40 years I have been searching .. but for a long time I didn't
>even know what I was looking for .. "god", "priest", "mentor",
>career, partner, marriage, children .. I was stopped at every turn.
>
>I didn't even know what it was I was looking for .. until finally,
>the vision through my eyes changed dramatically .. and I had no
>option but to focus my mind inward .. and shift my vision from
>outward searching to inner accepting ..
>
>I have shook with the vibration of knots being released from every
>part of my body .. there has been no pain like this release that I
>have ever known .. black shadowy figures and beings of light .. all
>rising from within my own body. I wondered many times when I would
>die ..
>
>and always the tears .. and with them all of the emotions that I have
>ever before experienced .. and then some ..
>
>as far as I had ever looked outside my self for answers, I was taken
>inwards. I had no choice.
>
>and then .. the absolute stillness of being consumed in the living
>dancing indigo blackness of what my vision saw as an inner living
>flame ..
>All opposites existing in each and every cell of my body. They make
>up me .. but they are not me. The nuclei of every cell is cloaked in
>living indigo .. and is the absolute essence of my Being ..
>and is that which I have been Seeking.
>Attack/repel. The unconscious battle cry of millennia of the
>attraction and repulsion of opposites.
>Both the nuclear DNA and the mtDNA being made twice the aberration
>when the covenant of blood with an external god made finding one's
>'core' even more remote and arduous.
>The core of every cell .. every frozen gene .. in my body was marked
>with a blood covenant and my potential barred to my mind. It was
>relatively easy to penetrate the exterior trappings of mtDNA (my
>maternal line of ancestors), past lives, reincarnations, soul choices
>. all part of my genetic memories .. memories which came from the
>cells of my unconscious body/mind. But, for me, it was almost
>impossible to penetrate the 'core' (where the paternal line lay
>hidden by Mother).
>
>This has, in the past, almost only been possible at the moment of
>conception and death .. setting up a closed inward loop of
>reincarnation to try and remember what was forgotten at birth and
>remembered at death .. too late ..
>My very core was sheathed in an ancient covenant with a god who
>demanded mutilations of the male's external life force symbol ..
>without which there would be no continuation of the genetic line.
>
>The nuclei of every cell in my body was tainted by the original
>covenant .. surrounded and re-enforced by the genetic code of silence
>among women of their grief of the defilement of male.. and for some
>also, the circumcision defilement of the female.
>When Eve was cursed, so was Adam. The circumcision of male
>effectively circumcised female too .. and the mark of Cain is the
>grief of remembering that almost every child carries.
>Another gate that was barred to the Garden.
>
>Another layer of encoding .. and underneath it all .. Shamballah, the
>Promised Land, Heaven? NO
>
>Access to the core of my Being .. the last veil to drop.
>And what do I find there?
>Silence .. Stillness .. No-Thing.
>
>All the screaming, the 'noise' encoded in the mtDNA stops. A still
>point. A gateway to the eternity of beingness. No God. Nothing. Words
>are a limitation. Even to speak the word is a separation from the
>still point. I sit in the silence .. and breathe.
>
>Just in and out breath and the sound of the silence. Breath and
>sound. The Sacred Fire. My Core. Innocence that has no name and
>cannot be owned.
>Breath and hissing sound sheathed by the mtDNA carrying all of the
>genetic memories of every sentient being who walked the earth .. all
>of my ancestors right back to the beginning ..
>
>The screaming of the mtDNA was deafening and this was the cry that
>has screamed in me for so long that "there must be more to this life
>. must be something else ..it can't be all there is .." and pushed
>me to remember.
>To remember and honour the silence in the core of every cell of my
>body and the space from which I came ..
>No light .. just the soft indigo luminous glow of the darkness. Yet
>not dark.
>
>That is what envelops the body after death and the tunnel of light
>. just like a vast ocean .. so easy to meld into the soft luminous
>life force moving in every speck .. Home.
>
>It has been easier to forget .. and fear the fire of potential of the
>core of my Self. The Onecell-f.
>Lifetime after lifetime spent searching for the truth .. My Truth.To
>the point of this lifetime of now recognising those whom I have met
>in other bodies in other lifetimes .. shared souls with even.
>I have remembered vows made .. to come back and re-join and break the
>codes. Vows broken by the fear of religious persecution .. and death
>without resolution.
>But also knowing of having had to wait such a very, very, very long
>time to see the mirror of my Beloved in the eyes of another.
>
>To be able to see who I really am through the reflection and
>realisation of core in another.
>
>To finally see the real me .. first in the mirror .. and then, when I
>turned inward .. within my cell-f.
>
>I know that this lifetime has not being in vain .. that the purpose
>of my reincarnation has now being fulfilled .. and I have lived to
>see it in full consciousness .. finally ..
>
>The immutable fire of the core of every cell of my body can now meld
>with its outer protective sheath .. all aspects of male and female no
>longer separate
>
>Conception of cell-f .. merging in full consciousness on every level
>. in an adult body ..
>
>without having to die to remember..
>
> -- Fiona Tulk,
> lifestreamsATnospambigpond.com
> http://www.anunda.com
>
> The material presented in this post is also archived for reference
> on the open archive http://groups.yahoo.com/group/lifestreams
>
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