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To: K-list
Recieved: 2000/03/25 05:58
Subject: [K-list] Re: Jerryananda's distress Part 2
From: Gcwein1111


On 2000/03/25 05:58, Gcwein1111 posted thus to the K-list:

From: GCWein1111ATnospamaol.com

In a message dated 3/24/00 3:41:00 PM Eastern Standard Time, GCWein1111
writes:

<<
 
 In a message dated 3/24/00 6:48:11 AM Eastern Standard Time,
hlutharATnospambryant.edu writes:
 
  > For time immemorial l've undertaken the supreme sacrifice of
  > maintaining this slender thread of ego attachment and have selflessly
endured
  > the pain of the unnatural confines of a body, solely for the purpose of
  > ministering to these unworthy pretenders. l can bear it no longer. Oh,
how l
  > would relinquish all my siddhis and samadhis ... how l would move heaven
and
  > earth for one good disciple!
  >
  > Shri Jerryananda,
  > Master of the 19th avataric plane and highest lokas
  >
  
  I feel your pain Sri Jerryananda Maha Yogi. I feel your pain. Especially
maintaining the slender thread of ego attachment must be awfully tough during
Kaliyuga.
  
  I am sure often you must have thought, "Oh the hell with it all! Let me
just go in the Total Absolute right Now!". The magnitude of your supreme
sacrifices brings sweet tears to the true devotees among us.
  
  Oh Master of the 19th Avataric plane and the highest lokas, have you
considered taking up dating the women here on the earthly plane? I know it
would be a step down (Would it be 19 steps down since you are on the 19th
plane?) for your totally elevated consciousness, but perhaps it could keep
you busy and entertained at least until you locate that one good disciple
that you have been searching for, for an eternity now it seems.
  
  I don't know what else to say Shri Jerryanandaji Maharaj. As devotees think
of your superhuman efforts, gratitude overcomes them, no doubt. May I request
that you post some of your positive accomplishments. I mean what have you
learned Shri Jerryananda? What would you say and what advice would you give
to those who will come after you to head the 19th Avataric plane? What are
the lessons here for us? I know these are difficult questions, by you are
eminently qualified Shri Jerryananda to provide us some clues now on how to
move forward.
  
  In respect and devotion
  Harsha
   >>

Dearest Harsha,
Only you and your sweet, loving tears can offer solace in
this, my greatest hour of sorrow. lt was only shortly after my missive to you
yesterday that l was beseiged by further untoward developments on this and
other planes. l have now been informed by none other than Guru Rinpoche
himself that both my status and duties are about to change, and all of this,
mind you, is a result of the misdeeds of my former disciples.

Because of them l have been stripped of avatarhood and have been denied
access to all but the lowest of lokas. The secret tantric teachings that were
in my trust have been forcibly sucked out of my brow chakra (no doubt the
reason l've felt such pain in this area these many years!), and have been
crystalized into sacred Terma for internment in the depths of the Himalayas.
l believe their location is in the vicinity of Mt Kailash, but l must warn
you, they are UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES to be found and opened before the end of
the present Kaliyuga.

Now, as for my present duties... this is especially painful... as
l said before, they have stripped me of my teachings and, of all things, have
instructed me that l must resume my legal career. The only loka in which l'm
allowed - the lowest loka of the hell realms - is where my departed disciples
are being held, pending trial. Swami Rape-Rama is charged with 12 counts of
sexual battery; Swami Mukta-to young girls-ananda is charged with 67 counts;
they've got Trungpa for selling crack and Ozel Tendzin for 568 charges of
sodomy.
 As if the courts of the lowest loka weren't taking up enough of
my time, l'm flying to Switzerland today to represent Maharishi make-a-buck
Yogi, where he's charged with racketeering and fraud for perverting the
ancient mantras and selling them like candy bars for obscene profits, in
addition to publishing bogus results for phony experiments conducted on
meditators at Maharishi U. Then on to lndia to represent Gurumuggermayi on a
carrying concealed weapons charge. Hey, this is just my caseload for today!
You think l've got time to teach? lt could even get worse: of Tendzin's 568
sodomy counts, they're talking about adding 345 counts of first degree
murder, since he knew he had AIDS when he had sex with the ones who've died.

Think of it, Harshaji. l
thought l was preparing them for the spiritual hall of fame, not the halls of
justice. The Miranda warnings have become their mantras. They wouldn't know
a siddhi if it bit 'em in the ass. Such is my fate. But hold on here.......
all may not be lost....... l just received a call from Sogyal Soiled Pants
Rinpoche. He's invited me to sit with him, Bertolucci and His Holiness at the
Oscars Sunday nite. l've tentatively agreed, so long as Steven Segal isn't
around. l've told the DL that l'll continue to support him and that R Geere
and P Coyote are okay, but no more of this Segal Rinpoche business! What's
that? ...Hold on a minute .... another call, this one from Kriyananda. He
says he just shagged Kate Moss on the boardwalk at Cannes. He wants me to
stop there enroute from Switzerland to lndia. Hey, a guy could get used to
this, you know? ......
Shri
Jerryananda,
Satguru to the Stars

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