To: K-list
Recieved: 1999/05/06 16:28
Subject: Re: [K-list] Seeking input from other seekers
From: Dave

-----Original Message-----
From: molecularbreeze <molecularbreezeATnospamsprynet.com>
To: kundaliniATnospamList-Server.net <kundaliniATnospamList-Server.net>
Date: Tuesday, May 04, 1999 3:14 PM
Subject: [K-list] Seeking input from other seekers

>Dear List Friends,
>
>I am writing to ask for responses, especially from those folks who have
>experienced similar situations.
>

<SNIP>
Such discussions are
>impossible, unless I just "take it" (his angering upon me and belittling
>me).
>

<SNIP>
How can I protect myself, yet at the same time not have
>it effect my children, such as limiting their time with him to the regular
>schedule, which benefits me by creating an avoidance of his wrath?

If I were you I would not like to be belittled in front of my children. I
would do as you have been
doing, and tell him treat you with respect when he visits you. I would be
concerned about him taking me
to court so I would get a lawyer's opinion.

 My
>decision to stick to the regular visitations is like taking something away
>from them?

I would not like to be abused if I were in that situation. I would tell the
children
that he is not treating me with respect when he visits, so he cannot come by
until
he does so.

<SNIP>
He is so viscious and I'm not going
>to take it anymore.

I don't think you should.
>
>I feel that since my children depend upon me, I must take care of me, so
>that I can be there for them. And this means avoiding situations of
>emotional abuse. Yet, my saying no, to protect myself (except for
>mediation, which I hope he will do), is also causing his rising up into an
>attack mode...threatening to take me to court and make scenes with the
>children

I would get some legal advice.

>
>I feel so unsafe. I just don't know what will happen next as I begin
>approaching life these days, by exercising my right as a person to say no.

I don't blame you for not feeling safe, and I support you in your position.
>
>Connie
>

Dave

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---

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