kundalini-l-d Digest				Volume 96 : Issue 164 

Date: Thu, 26 Sep 96 
From: Mistress Angelique Serpent 
Subject: Re: Sexual K Experiences:yours          

 My ego feels abandoned, but at the same time, I also 
>feel that he came by at just the exact time to push each of us up one 
>more step on the ladder of conscious evolution! And so I release him, 
>with peace, love, and appreciation, and I forgive him for the abuse. 
>(How can you not forgive an ignorant person?)
>
>In the Service of the Light also,
>Melody
>

Thankyou, Melody 
That is very beautiful, and I can relate:
My K. opening was also partly born of love and lust,
 but fueled to explosiveness
by desperation and despair over my broken heart.
He was driven away, I think in fear over my healing abilities.
When I gave him energy, he fell asleep mid-sentence.
Grieving, I turned to my higher power, and experienced 
what I heard described years later on late night P.B.S.T.V. 
by a Tibetan Lama as 'the opening of enlightenment.'
I shall never forget the unconditional love and acceptance
from my Higher self and guardian Angels, so much that even though
- my body was vibrating and feeling filled with light
streach myself though I might, I was only able to take in
 a tiny portion of that incredible love.
And the bumpy years after, solitaire,
not understanding fully what was happening to me, 
and really only wanting to crawl back into the light, like a womb.
The light, of course, refused to be a crutch.
I would try to crawl back, and get close,
and it would boot me out into the world
 for another tough reality lesson. 
Then unexpectedly envelope me 
the power of beauty making me weep.
These forces sculpting me into a new shape
the unfolding of a life potential that I'd scarcely dreamt.
But I had to learn that all my ugly bits and hard history
had purpose. (ref. my website http://www.domin8rex.com/serpent)
What I have learned lately, is that I am much older, far more powerful 
and more widely travelled, than all my previous past life journeys had revealed.
I am here by choice, for the millennium.
 The Portal is opening. There is work to do!
But it seems the more I go with the flow and follow my vision,
 the faster the current carries me.
the pace of my river these days is such
I feel if I dare to fight the process, I would smash on the rapids.
New strangeness comes so quickly 
it has become almost normal, cosmic surprise parties everywhere.
The journey continues.
                        Blessings, Angelique.


-
Date: Thu, 26 Sep 1996 
From: hbarrettATNOSPAMix.netcom.com (Holly N. Barrett, Ph.D.)
Subject: k, my hearing aids & my pager

I got a new set of hearing aids around the same time as my opening.  I 
cannot seem to keep them in working order, the right or left one is 
always back at the factory being repaired.  When my pager also started 
going kablooey I began to wonder if k has an effect on electronic 
devices.  In the past I've had the not uncommon experience of blowing 
every lightbulb I turned on within a certain period.  The weirdest 
development is:  I wear my pager on my waistband, set to vibration mode 
because the alarm is so shrieking it takes a year off my life every 
time I get a page; now that exact spot on my body buzzes on its own, 
whether I'm wearing the pager or not, usually waking me from a deep 
sleep.  Has anyone a clue of what is going on here?!

Holly 


-
Date: Thu, 26 Sep 1996 
From: Jan Watson 
Subject: kids and k

Hi all

I'm still gathering all sorts of information and the next step for me is 
to ask for info from you about children.  Just as we affect the male / 
female in our lives with our energies blasting, so too I suspect we 
affect our children. I notice distinct differences in one of mine  when 
the energies are  particularly high in me.  He becomes, restless, hyper 
sensitive, has strange dreams, and sometimes seems to 'blank out'.   Any 
one know of any books that may deal with this side of K?  

Thanks for listening

jan


-
Date: Thu, 26 Sep 96 
From: Theresa "A." Catoe 
Subject: Royalel

Royalel,

Thanks. I have also studied Reiki. Let me know when you finish your 
home page. Since I'm off the subject, I want take up anymore space. 
Do you mind giving me your email address?
-
Love & Light,

T.C.

tcatoeATNOSPAMcetlink.net



Date: Thu, 26 Sep 96 
From: Theresa "A." Catoe 
Subject: Doreen

Hi Doreen,

I would love to hear more of your story. Send it to me directly, not 
through the list.

Also, please call me T.C., thanks.

Looking forward to hearing from you. Besure to give me your email 
address.

Love & Light,

T.C.



Date: Thu, 26 Sep 1996 
From: melody.gaviganATNOSPAMnvonline.com (Melody Gavigan)
Subject: Fwd: Psychoses problems


-> After doing spirit healing, I went through a brief psychoses, and now I have
-> an internal voice/I believe spirit conversing/nagging/threateningly me
-> consistently.

-> I was wondering if you could advise a cure for me or some sort of healing.

-        How do I get in touch with this person? I know a lot about this
subject; I might be able to reassure them.

Melody



Date: Fri, 27 Sep 1996 
From: GrandmmaATNOSPAMaol.com
Subject: Re: k, my hearing aids & my pager
-
Holly,
I don't really understand how the increased vibratory rate we experience
affects electronic devices but I too have had problems in this area.  Often
when I drive down the street I find the street lights going off just as I
move under them.  At first I thought it was caused from my headlights or the
time of day but when I have someone in the car with me they always comment on
the phenomenon.  Only one other person that I know in my area experiences
this same thing and they are also going through a K awakening.  I also have
trouble with my kitchen appliances.   At times when the K  energy  is most
intense,  I can't get my microwave to turn on.  If my kids happen to be
visiting me I leave the room and have them turn it on.  I have also had
trouble with the lights in my house.  Sometimes they seem to temporally short
out.  My computer and TV also seem to short out for no apparent reason.  I
thought for a while that my imagination was playing tricks on me concerning
all this malfunction but after a while I realized there was a definate
pattern.    I have also found that since my awakening I have become very
sensitive to electrical magnetic radiation.  I feel depleted when I am around
florescent lighting or the excessive use of any electrical appliances.  I
have a special screen over the monitor on my computer to cut down on the
electrical magnetic radiation but still have to  limit my usage.  The TV also
has become a problem.  Often it weird things.  When it does work it seems to
be more of an irritant than anything else.  I have also noticed that my hair
drives my crazy.  At times it feels like it is standing on end.  I have long
hair and frequently get the urge to shave my head but being somewhat vain, I
just wear it up.  I now understand why yogi's  wear turbins and others do
shave their heads.   Sometimes I feel like getting my electricity shut off.
  Sometimes I'm not sure it's worth the constant irritation.  So you are not
alone.  Hope this helps.
                                                   Love and light        Jean
-


Date: Sat, 28 Sep 1996 
From: Paco 
Subject: RE: Dan's Possibilities

Regarding chat rooms etc. all those solutions mentioned
are kinda too complicated...Web Chat Broadcasting system
has free, unlimited chat that you can include graphics
with if you want. It's fast, easy to use, easy to read
and never crashes. Just hit WBS page and register your
code name and password, and we could set up meeting times
or anybody could. It's pretty cool
http://wbs.net/wbs/login.html
I used to spend hours(days(weeks(months))) there and
it is very reliable and FUN! You can even create a
custom pass word protected room, easy. It is all completely
100% free. Later
		
-		---Paco



Date: Sat, 28 Sep 1996 
From: Paco 
Subject: Re: Chat Room

Yeah, Pow Wow is really cool too, never tried it
but everyone says it is really good.
-
		---Paco



Date: Fri, 27 Sep 1996 
From: ori^ 
Subject: Electronic devices [was: k, my hearing aids & my pager]

At 06:17 PM 9/26/96 -0700, Holly N. Barrett, Ph.D. wrote:
>I got a new set of hearing aids ... always ... being repaired.  
>... pager also started going kablooey I began to wonder if k 
>has an effect on electronic devices. ...experience of blowing 
>every lightbulb I turned on... 
>Has anyone a clue of what is going on here?!

Hello Holly and list,
This is an area not unfamiliar to me though I honestly had never
thought to call it an effect of kundalini... I simply thought of
it as my energy spiking.  I noticed it most often when I was working
online and my modem would drop me at the most interesting times.
Usually when the energy was high, and inevitably (to tie in with
the sexual thread) when there was definite sexual energy flowing,
whether overtly expressed or not.  My modem cut out at such
"coincidental" times so frequently, that the connection became
clear very quickly.

For a certain period of time my modem seemed to be very sensitive
to my energy states and I even went in search of some crystals to
place on and around my computer in an attempt to absorb and/or
reflect the energy.

Now that I think back, it was a time when what might be called
my kundalini seemed to be awakening in a major way, although...
I thought of it as working with energy.  The experiences of many
on the list seem so similar and familiar to me that I think what
I have called energy is the same as what others have called
kundalini.

I've been in a much quieter period of energy activity, and
not surprisingly my modem has been very well behaved lately :)

Love to all,
ori^

P.S. Although isn't it curious... that as I finished typing this
email, my modem had quit again and I couldn't send this till I
dialed in again later.  hmmmm


-
******
*              ori^                   *
*            oriATNOSPAMeskimo.com           *
* http://www.eskimo.com/~ori/ori.html *
****** 



Date: Fri, 27 Sep 1996 
From: Jari Vanha-Eskola 
Subject: How to control side-effects of K ?

	Hi!

I've been a lurker for a couple of weeks and finally decided to post to
ask for help in dealing with physical K manifestations.

I started practising chakra meditation about 2 weeks ago and immediately
noticed that my sexual desires intensified.  Then after a week of
practising Root and Sex Chakra meditations I began waking up in the
middle of the night, feeling uneasy, sort of anxiety and having
uncontrollable muscle spasms.  Fortunately, just a day earlier somebody
had posted an article to this list dealing with K side-effects, so when
the spasms happened, I knew what was happening even though it felt a
little frightening since nothing of the sort has ever happened to me. 

During the past week this has happened three times and it's getting a
little annoying... So I was wondering: does anyone have any suggestions
how to control those 'attacks' or even make them stop? I've even
considered giving up chakra meditation to get rid of the side effects...

I'm following a book called "Kundalini Awakening: A Gentle Guide to
Chakra Activation and Spiritual Growth" (or something in those lines,
don't have the book with me at the moment) and I've advanced up to my
Heart Chakra. 

I do meditations at night before going to bed (at about 1 am) and then
usually wake up around 3 or 4 in the morning for about 20 minutes...
Might the time of meditation affect my sleep? Would it be better to
meditate in the morning?

I'd like to hear your experiences, especially if you've had similar
problems with regard to your first steps on the K path...

Also, haakonuATNOSPAMtelepost.no (Haakon Rian Ueland) wrote:
To round off - in my opinion, mental "illness" and Kundalini are closely
related, quite simply because our Western medical system doesn't understand
what a Kundalini Awakening can do to a person. 

This sounds scary... could you please explain this a little further. I
didn't start Kundalini meditations to become a lunatic in the eyes of
other people... Are you saying that Kundalini might cause mental
illnesses? 

			Confused,		Jari
-- 
Jari Vanha-Eskola         !  Internet:  Jari.Vanha-EskolaATNOSPAMhelsinki.fi
University of Helsinki	  !  WWW: 	http://www.helsinki.fi/~vanhaesk/

-

Date: Fri, 27 Sep 1996 
From: melody.gaviganATNOSPAMnvonline.com (Melody Gavigan)
Subject: kids and k

All I know is that what it says in _The Celestial Prophecy_ about how we
all steal energy from each other and that it is very important not to
steal energy from our kids! We must give them continuous consciousness
attention and be sending them unconditional love as absolutely
frequently as possible. The temptation to steal energy from them,
thus draining their vitality is great in a weak parent.

At night, I place my hand over my daughter's heart center and tell her
I am sending her love straight to her heart and I ask her to receive it.

Believe me, I am no perfect parent. I just got back from the emergency
room and my daughter has a severe kidney infection. I feel like I've
been doing something wrong, but I know it was just ignorance on my
part.
-
Melody



Date: Fri, 27 Sep 1996 
From: melody.gaviganATNOSPAMnvonline.com (Melody Gavigan)
Subject: Re: Nannu and Sexuality

HH>I would love to have an ongoing thread, with no salaciousness, about how the
-  >sexual function is altered, especially when the ego lets the K take over,
  >during awakening.  This has been a major part of my own experience for the
  >entire 7 months it has been going on.  If the thread seems doable, I promise
  >to be totally candid.

HH>Howard

     I want to hear every detail of it.

Melody
-
 * 1st 2.00 #7384 * It is only relevant to have what most matters to you.



Date: Fri, 27 Sep 1996 
From: melody.gaviganATNOSPAMnvonline.com (Melody Gavigan)
Subject: The current

->   >But it seems the more I go with the flow and follow my vision,  
->   > the faster the current carries me.  
->   >the pace of my river these days is such  
->   >I feel if I dare to fight the process, I would smash on the rapids.  
->   >New strangeness comes so quickly  
->   >it has become almost normal, cosmic surprise parties everywhere.  
->   >The journey continues.  

Angelique, this is SO TRUE!! A little miracle here, a little coincidence
there, one right after the other.....surrender to it all.

Melody



Date: Fri, 27 Sep 1996 
From: melody.gaviganATNOSPAMnvonline.com (Melody Gavigan)
Subject: Kundalini sexual awakenings

This message was originally addressed to CJFRANKATNOSPAMUNM.EDU 
and was forwarded to you by MELODY GAVIGAN 
-                ----------------------------------- 
This message was originally addressed to MISTRESSATNOSPAMDOMIN8REX.COM  
and was forwarded to you by MELODY GAVIGAN  
                -----------------------------------  
Subject: Re: Sexual K Experiences:yours                                
  
Angelique,  
     Your post make me cry! I feel all these things so deeply that you   
describe! You even used the word "portal." I had rented a video a   
couple of weeks ago about the Egyptian pyramids and it showed all about   
how they built these portals to the heavens. I couldn't get that   
concept out of my mind...I am now a Portal! And then you say it!  
     Yes, grief can be wonderfully healing. Native Americans say that   
our heart is moistened by tears, it becomes soft, receptive, earthy,   
through grieving. My personality has become soft, receptive, and   
earthy. People say that my voice has even changed; it comes from a   
place deep within my core Self now, since the beginning of my 3rd chakra   
awakening. Watches won't work on me and TVs lose their channels around   
me...guess the energy fields are a problem.  
  
In mutual Service to the Light and waiting for the millenium,  
Melody  
  
P.S.Would love to see your homepage, but I don't have Web access.  
  
You wrote:   
MS>Thankyou, Melody  
  >That is very beautiful, and I can relate:  
  >My K. opening was also partly born of love and lust,  
  > but fueled to explosiveness  
-  >by desperation and despair over my broken heart.  
  >He was driven away, I think in fear over my healing abilities.  
  >When I gave him energy, he fell asleep mid-sentence.  
  >Grieving, I turned to my higher power, and experienced  
  >what I heard described years later on late night P.B.S.T.V.  
  >by a Tibetan Lama as 'the opening of enlightenment.'  
  >I shall never forget the unconditional love and acceptance  
  >from my Higher self and guardian Angels, so much that even though  
  > my body was vibrating and feeling filled with light  
  >streach myself though I might, I was only able to take in  
-  > a tiny portion of that incredible love.  
  >And the bumpy years after, solitaire,  
  >not understanding fully what was happening to me,  
  >and really only wanting to crawl back into the light, like a womb.  
  >The light, of course, refused to be a crutch.  
  >I would try to crawl back, and get close,  
  >and it would boot me out into the world  
  > for another tough reality lesson.  
  >Then unexpectedly envelope me  
  >the power of beauty making me weep.  
-  >These forces sculpting me into a new shape  
  >the unfolding of a life potential that I'd scarcely dreamt.  
  >But I had to learn that all my ugly bits and hard history  
  >had purpose. (ref. my website http://www.domin8rex.com/serpent)  
  >What I have learned lately, is that I am much older, far more   
powerful   >and more widely travelled, than all my previous past life   
journeys had revea   >I am here by choice, for the millennium.  
  > The Portal is opening. There is work to do!  
  >But it seems the more I go with the flow and follow my vision,  
  > the faster the current carries me.  
-  >the pace of my river these days is such  
  >I feel if I dare to fight the process, I would smash on the rapids.  
  >New strangeness comes so quickly  
  >it has become almost normal, cosmic surprise parties everywhere.  
  >The journey continues.  
  >                        Blessings, Angelique.  
  
 * 1st 2.00 #7384 * Create for the sake of the creation itself.  


-
Date: Fri, 27 Sep 1996 
From: stampmanATNOSPAMix.netcom.com (Daniel Rusch-Fischer )
Subject: Re: Shri Devi & breezes

Are some chakras more "left sided" than "right"?
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Maurizio knows more about the Sahaja view of this than I (different 
schools have different interpretations). But, the list from Sahaja is 
as follows:
1 mooladhara    =   sacrum/tailbone         =   heel of palm
2 swadisthan    =   lower abdomen/genitals  =   thumb
3 nabhi         =   stomach/navel           =   middle finger
4 ?             =   heart                   =   little finger
5 vishuddhi     =   throat                  =   index finger
6 agnya         =   forehead, 3rd eye       =   ring finger
7 sahasrara     =   crown, fontanelle       =   palm of hand
Hope that is informative. These are really just maps; ways of talking 
about internal perceptions in terms that the communicators agree on. 
Also, you may have noticed that there is considerable disparity in the 
spelling of these esoteric terms. Just as in transliterating Chinese 
into English (Wade, pinyin), there have been a number of systems in 
use. The British are responsible for both the most abominable and the 
most accurate transliterations out of Sanskrit and various Indian 
languages. During the Raj, for example, the local British postmasters 
would spell the name of their locality as it sounded to them - not more 
than one cancel found on a 19th century stamp has baffled collectors 
for decades, as even to a native English speaker, the spelling was so 
bad that the actual town name was unidentifiable without supporting 
evidence! Anyway, Sanskrit (Prakrita, of course, also) is rife with 
aspirant consonants that don't exist in English or are not generally 
recognized by English speakers. That is why Hathayoga is NOT pronounced 
with the first syllable as in the name Hathaway. The 't' that is used 
in the second syllable is the aspirant form that sounds like the 't' in 
'ten' instead of the unaspirated 't' heard in 'bitten' as pronounced by 
American speakers and most educated British speakers (oddly, some 
dialects of British have no unaspirated form of 't' at all). This seems 
odd at first, since both forms sound and appear similar to us, but in 
the Devanagari script used to spell these words, they are two totally 
different letters and don't even occur sequentially in a Sanskrit 
dictionary. As an aside, the 'th' that is used to spell the English 
sounds heard in 'the' and 'thing' are linguistically rare beasts and 
occur in only a relatively few languages - not at all in Sanskrit.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Treues berecht, Du! Did you write this just to repeat what I wrote 
before or do you actually know what it means?
--------------------------------------------------------------------
I am sorry, Steve. I vaguely remember adding that to the end of my 
email, and I am sure it refers to your question about the phrase you 
heard. I don't know what it means. It looks German. I say that because 
my Grandma used to always use the word Du when referring to me (that is 
when I was naughty, she was very proper and never cussed.....in 
English, that is. Would always lapse into German and say Du, 
something-or-other, Du. Which I took to mean, you, *##$**, you.)
DAN-RF  =-)



Date: Fri, 27 Sep 1996 
From: stampmanATNOSPAMix.netcom.com (Daniel Rusch-Fischer )
Subject: Re: How to control side-effects of K ?

You wrote: Hi! Also, haakonuATNOSPAMtelepost.no (Haakon Rian Ueland) wrote:
To round off - in my opinion, mental "illness" and Kundalini are 
closely related, quite simply because our Western medical system 
doesn't understand what a Kundalini Awakening can do to a person. 
This sounds scary... could you please explain this a little further. I
didn't start Kundalini meditations to become a lunatic in the eyes of
other people... Are you saying that Kundalini might cause mental
illnesses?
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Hi Jari, and welcome,
I am sure that Haakon will respond with his far more experienced and 
knowledgeable interpretation to the above, but I think this point is 
very important and would like to add my view.

My son is currently going through some mental problems and I have been 
doing a lot of late night research to better understand his affliction. 
In my searching I keep seeing the DSM-IV (Diagnostic & Statistical 
Manual of Mental Disorders - Fourth Edition) quoted as an authority. It 
is available online and I have been referring to it often. I found that 
certain symptoms keep being referenced that I can categorically state 
that I and many on this list exhibit in a classical way. It started to 
concern me as did my original awakening sequellae. After a while, I 
started to note that many of these same symptoms are listed for many 
different mental disorders. Then the realization (must have been a =-) 
satori(cal) moment) hit me - none of these symptoms (and yes, making 
puns and plays on words are hot-button diagnosis criteria!) mean 
anything in anyone's life if they don't cause you to loose your 
perception of reality or behave in an injurious way to yourself or 
others. Yes, even the DMS-IV, the Heilige Schrift of the psychiatric 
profession, recognizes and states that care must be taken to 
differentiate between psychoses and spiritual states as they DO 
resemble each other superficially to the trained and more significantly 
to the uninitiated.

Holy men, saints, and even the unmitigatedly benevolent have all 
appeared daft to some and as shining examples to others. I, myself, 
have given up putting a huge investment of my psyche into conforming 
how I appear to others to THEIR beliefs. I conform to societal norms 
such as wearing clothes in public, but if I wish to take a ten minute 
meditation break at work (and it is breaktime) I close my eyes and 
'tune out'. Some recognize what I am doing, others think I am doing 
some goofy sixties-guru-thing or just being antisocial - THAT I don't 
care about, and yes, it does appear eccentric to some. I have also 
found that I am far more sensitive emotionally, I have larger mood 
swings that tend to make me sadder at times than I have been and also 
more elated at others. I was barraged by a torrent of psychic phenomena 
that you may find dire warnings about. Bullroar! They have quieted down 
considerably and it was absolutely essential that they happened - 
despite how disturbing they were to me. I am currently going through a 
series of spontaneous asanas, mudras and pranic breathings (doing 
pranayoga in my sleep - my wife tells me). The coincidences and 
psychic-type phenomena were just a part of the development that I 
needed to go through on MY journey (I use the phrase that "I am on a 
different rock in the same stream" from the others on the list). What I 
needed to learn/accept was that "there is, in some things, no knowing; 
just belief or disbelief." When I truly accepted that in my soul, the 
pummeling by psychic-appearing events slowed down and now when they 
happen, I just grin (humor is one of the really great things about this 
- I used to be VERY serious and quite a grump =-). I smile, accept the 
event and REALLY KNOW that it makes NO DIFFERENCE in the world if there 
is or is not an explanation for it - IT JUST IS! The things that are 
now happening seem to be clearing out cobwebs and debris from me in 
some mysterious sort of spiritual way - they are surprising, appear odd 
occasionally, but they don't hurt me and I just accept them.

I think that that in itself is an important lesson for me and perhaps 
others - faith in the mothering instinct of the kundalini to take care 
of me in the way that she needs to for my benefit. How often is a child 
injured by trusting his mother?

Love and LAUGHING LIGHT =-)
DAN-RF



Date: Fri, 27 Sep 1996 
From: traveler 
Subject: Re: Sexual post
-
>From: Mark Rivera 
>To: traveler 
>
>I found Osho to be long winded. The sight had little to it and the mailing
>list was not friendly. People never wrote back. I think your answer is a
>cop out. Interesting you have to writeunder two seperate identities. What
>are you hiding?
>
Dear Mark,
-
I am doing this in public because I am formally asking the list for my
support in asking you not to correpsond with me further. I have done my best
to answer your questions to my best knowledge. Please stop any and all
further private communication with me.

Thank you, sincerely, Patti